Ace – “Hazard” would seem to fit, I was there when he ran his cart into the
trees, after hearing the cart crash and seeing Tug walking sheepishly back to
the green like nothing was wrong.
Best/Shaft
Sent from Mail<https://go.microsoft.com/fwlink/?LinkId=550986> for Windows 10
From: dwayne-kay<mailto:dwayne-kay@xxxxxxx>
Sent: Saturday, May 6, 2017 2:43 PM
To: sogagg@xxxxxxxxxxxxx<mailto:sogagg@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Subject: [sogagg] SOGAGG Candidate for Membership: Tug McGraw
SOGAGG Colleagues,
By unanimous vote, Tug McGraw is approved for membership in the Society of
Golfers Against Good Golf. May God rest his soul…
Knockdown, assume you will do the honors in informing Tug of his devalued
status within society.
Action items for all hands: Tug’s nickname. As tradition dictates, an
incoming member is not allowed to either pick or influence the moniker that he
or she will be required to bear throughout his/her tortuous existence within
these ranks of hapless and wayward golfing wannabes.
The following recommendations have been put forth for consideration. Please
vote on one:
1. “Hazard” – Stems from his ability (“inability”?) to properly negotiate
the golf course while driving the cart. Case in point: Driving the cart
directly into the woods/underbrush and requiring three cohorts plus himself to
extract the vehicle. Yet another: Last week at the charity golf tournament at
the Eastlake Country Club, he casually stepped on some discolored ground only
to sink in nearly up to his knees in gooey, black mud.
2. “Mudder” – (1) (Horse Racing) Relating to a horse that runs well in the
wet and mud (2) (General Sporting Terms) an athlete that performs well or is
not deterred by wet or muddy conditions.
3. “Dirt Free” – A factious reference to the opposite condition he
presented after the charity golf incident.
I ask for your votes soonest and once we’ve arrived at a consensus, I will
arrange for the shirt.
Note: The SOGAGG ranks now stand at 17 members.
Best to all,
/Ace
