[ SHOWGSD-L ] The Stella Awards

From: BAERENTATZE312@xxxxxxx
To: showgsd-l@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Date: Sun, 2 Sep 2007 18:28:20 EDT
Time once again to review the winners of the Annual "Stella Lawsuit
Awards." The Stella Awards are named after 81 year-old Stella Liebeck,
who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonald's. That
case inspired the Stella Lawsuit Awards for the most frivolous,
ridiculous, stupid but successful lawsuits in the United States.
Here are this year's winners.......

5th Place (tie):

A jury of her peers awarded Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, $80,000
after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside
a furniture store. The owner of the store was understandably surprised
at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little toddler was Ms.
Robertson's own son.

5th Place (tie):

19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses
because his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman
apparent didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he
was trying to steal the car's hubcaps.

5th Place (tie):

Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had
just finished robbing, by way of the garage. He was not able to get the
garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning.
He couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the house and
garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and
Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He
subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food.
He sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him
undue mental anguish. The jury agreed, to the tune of $500,000. In my
opinion, this is so outrageous that it should have been 2nd place!

4th Place:

Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and medical
expenses after being bit on the buttocks by his next-door neighbor's
beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award
was less than what Mr. Williams sought because the jury felt the dog
might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams, who
had climbed over the fence into the yard and was shooting it repeatedly
with a pellet gun.

3rd Place:

A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster,
Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her
tailbone. The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it
at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

2nd Place:

Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a
nightclub in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window
to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while
Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to
avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental
expenses.

1st Place:

This year's runaway winner was Mrs. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City,
Oklahoma. Mrs. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago motor
home. On her first trip home, she set the cruise control at 70 mph, and
went to the back to make herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the RV
left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Mrs. Grazinski sued the
company for not advising her in the owner's manual that she couldn't
actually do this. The jury awarded her $1,750,000 plus a new motor home.
The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit,
just in case there were any other total morons around.



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[ SHOWGSD-L ] The Stella Awards

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