[ SHOWGSD-L ] Re: Dog Show Terminology 101
- From: Robert Neiman <bnbgsds2000@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: gailbauman1@xxxxxxx, List <showgsd-l@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Mon, 11 Feb 2008 11:28:40 -0800 (PST)
I absolutely loved it. Can I crosspost it?
Bob Neiman
Gail BAUMAN <gailbauman1@xxxxxxx> wrote:
Thought this was cute:
For those new to showing and breeding some essential terminology you should
know!!!
Dog Show Terms Explained!
Angulation- Degree to which dog handlers will bend over backwards to impress
judges.
Balance- (a) How to arrange the checkbook so your husband won't know how much
money you spent on dog shows last month. Usually done in the bathroom with the
door locked;
(b) Ability to hold coffee, danish, leash, treats and entry form all at once.
Bitch- (a) Proper name for a female dog;
(b) Name often heard at dog shows, not always to describe a female dog.
CGC- Canine Gastrointestinal Catastrophe {aka GAS}
Coat- The hairy covering of a dog that usually falls out about one week before
the Specialty show.
Crabbing- What you do when the judge doesn't like your dog.
Dam- (a) A female dog with puppies;
(b) Expression frequently overheard at dog shows as losers leave the ring.
Distemper- Shown by those competitors who just lost to someone they can't stand.
Dog- To chase a judge from show to show in an effort to attain more breed wins.
Elbow- Method of getting to ringside quickly when late.
Expression- "Sweet" look adopted by hungry dogs while staring ravenously at
chunks of liver.
Fancier- Degree to which some gentlemen handlers dress more than others.
Feathering- What winners are accused of doing to judges' nests.
Front- Part of the dog often facing the outside of the ring.
Guard Hair- An activity in which one watches intently as the dog's hair falls
out, in clumps, just after entries are mailed.
Heel- (a) What you feel like when your dog beats the one you had just sold to
an eager novice;
(b) Expression often screamed to attract the attention of deaf dogs.
Hock- A way of financing your dog shows by the use of jewelry such as wedding
rings.
Kennel- Where you go when the kids fight and your husband is in one of his
moods.
Litter- Trash left all over the building and parking lot after a dog show.
Mask- What to wear when you have to show your gorgeous pick of the litter that
fell apart a week before the show.
Muzzle- What to put on your kids at a dog show to prevent them from calling
your competition what they overheard you call him last night.
Overshot- Running so fast as to pass the 1st place ring marker and plow into
the judge and the stewards.
Pedigree- Dog food with lots of coupons.
Points- Minute, invisible awards for winning which you cannot convince your
spouse are more important than cash prizes.
Puppies- Small, dog like food-processing machines with the ability to stink up
an entire house and collectively deafen a band of magpies. (These creatures
have not yet been perfected, as they come with leaky systems, and can also be
dangerous to weak hearts and bank accounts.)
Qualifying Score- Justifying the 170.5 you got in obedience today.
Ribbons- What competitive exhibitors with distemper (see above) will cut you
into when your dog places over theirs.
Specialty- Whatever your dog is good at, like bringing home dead cats or
chewing on walls.
Type- What your dog has... if you turn down the lights and squint a little.
Utility- The kind of vehicle you need to haul around your dogs.
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POST is Copyrighted 2007. All material remains the property of the original
author and of GSD Communication, Inc. NO REPRODUCTIONS or FORWARDS of any kind
are permitted without prior permission of the original author AND of the
Showgsd-l Management. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
ALL PERSONS ARE ON NOTICE THAT THE FORWARDING, REPRODUCTION OR USE IN ANY
MANNER OF ANY MATERIAL WHICH APPEARS ON SHOWGSD-L WITHOUT THE EXPRESS
PERMISSION OF ALL PARTIES TO THE POST AND THE LIST MANAGEMENT IS EXPRESSLY
FORBIDDEN, AND IS A VIOLATION OF LAW. VIOLATORS OF THIS PROHIBITION WILL BE
PROSECUTED.
For assistance, please contact the List Management at admin@xxxxxxxxxxxx
VISIT OUR WEBSITE - www.showgsd.org
============================================================================
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