Hi Jessi
I found this poem so moving. Its visceral evocation of heat, body, place
and some kind of profound loss is potent. I love the intimate, confessional
tone between the speaker and the listener and that sense I am privy to
something perhaps not quite meant for me. I am interested in how the
particularity of the loss / operation / trauma is not spelled out. (for me
it could be the loss of a child, a tumour cut out or a reflection on
self-harm - but of course could be many other things).
I really love the whole first stanza, its sense of swollen-ness - as with a
wound, recovering.
I like how the italics interrupt and add the listener into the poem.
And love this line: We are learning my body together, together navigating
its newness
My only query is this line: *your scars are beautiful*
I feel like I want something slightly other or slightly more about this
relationship to the scars (even our speaker's response to that statement,
if it sits right with them) - it feels a little too neat.
Thanks for sharing this beautiful piece.
Emilie
On Fri, 18 Jan 2019 at 18:47, Jessica C <j.cohen2031@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Hi everyone,
Reading your poems is a delight - don’t think I’ve ever enjoyed checking
my emails quite this much.
Well I suppose I can’t put this off any longer; here is the first draft of
my poem ‘Shrinking’.
Cheers,
Jessi
