OT: Twelve good reasons NOT to attend the NoCOUG conference tomorrow

  • From: Iggy Fernandez <iggy_fernandez@xxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: "oracle-l@xxxxxxxxxxxxx" <oracle-l@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Tue, 21 May 2013 15:20:51 -0700

#12 All NoCOUG emails automatically go to your spam folder, including this one. 
You rely on Outlook for career guidance.

#11 They won’t send a stretch limousine to pick you up and take you back.

#10 They talked up SQL for 25 years but now, they’re all, like, “No SQL.” I 
mean, really!

#9 You’re too busy to learn. (A very good problem to have!)

#8 Your head is exploding with knowledge already. (Another very good problem to 

#7 It’s always the same people there, like Iggy and Kamran. (We totally 
understand but we can’t tell them to stop coming, can we?)

#6 You were there the day NoCOUG webmaster Eric Hutchinson sang the theme song 
from Cheers “Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name.” You 
don’t ever want to hear Eric sing again. Ever!

#5 The food is just too good. You eat to live, not live to eat. (Good for you!)

#4 You don’t appreciate being bribed with free raffle prizes like iPads, Oracle 
Press teddy bears, and Oracle Press books. (The world needs more upright and 
honest people!)

#3 You’ve been going for 25 years already; it’s time for a change. You’re going 
to AARP meetings now (American Association of Retired Persons).

#2 You’ve finally converted your company to Excel spreadsheets. So much cheaper 
and easier to use!

But the #1 reason not to attend the NoCOUG conference tomorrow is:

#1  You thought that NoCOUG was the North Carolina Oracle Users Group on the 
East coast.

P.S. Seriously, write to us at contact_nocoug@xxxxxxxxxx and tell us where we 
could do better: Topics? Speakers? Location? Cost? Food? Website? Service?      

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