Not believing in God but believing in the belief in God,
For a year in which we welcomed our first child (a son, in May) into
the world, I also undertook to try and make more sense of things that
'ought' to matter. While gestation was progressing (isn't that
clinical?), I thought of all the things an expectant father might
think of -- and probably more -- but front and centre was "how do I
explain 'belief' to him?" My first thought was that I didn't want to
impart 'just-so stories' to him, unless they were actually Kipling's.
As a lifelong (since I was about 4) "unbeliever", I read books both
those that were familiar:
Richard Dawkins (The God Delusion)
Christopher Hitchens (God is NOT Great)
Sam Harris (The End of Faith and Letter to a Christian Nation)
Michel Onfray (In Defence of Atheism)
Victor Stenger (God: The Failed Hypothesis)
But, also those with which I had to actively hunt down for the 'other'
side:
Alister E. McGrath , Joanna Collicutt Mcgrath (The Dawkins Delusion?:
Atheist Fundamentalism and the Denial of the Divine)
Michael Behe (The Edge of Evolution: The Search for the Limits of
Darwinism)
Dinesh D'Souza (What is so Good about Christianity)
Francis Collins (The Language of God)
Mario Beauregard and Denyse O'leary (The Spiritual Brain: A
Neuroscientist's Case for the Existence of the Soul)
As well as a host of Philosophical or "Scientific" books including,
but not limited to:
Steven Pinker (The Stuff of Thought -- JLS would LOVE this book!)
Douglas R. Hofstadter (I am a Strange Loop)
Daniel Dennett (Breaking the Spell)
And guess what... I'm STILL an unbeliever and still confused as to
what to impart upon our babe. I guess I could take Geary's advice and
not make the little guy into a laughing stock/whipping post and just
toe the line with all the tooth-faerie, santa claus stuff. And this IS
probably the best advice to not rock the boat... but I still have
tremendous philosophical reservations about doing this.
We have already had him baptized - something which I took as little
part in as I could, but I did mainly for his mother. This was a very
informal, family-only ceremony which saw me burst out laughing when we
were asked to do the "answers" to 'god's wishes' etc. as I read the
prayer book and I was asked
"DO you, in the name of this Child, renounce the devil and all his
works, the vain pomp and glory of the world, with all covetous desires
of the same, and the sinful desires of the flesh, so that you will not
follow nor be led by them?
I found myself feeling as if I was trapped in a Monty Python Skit. But
I made it through and I guess if the little feller dies, he won't go
sideways. In doing some research about the ceremony, I noticed that
The Anglican Church has a provision for "emergency baptism" in the
case of a sick child. All I can say is "WOW!" But I thought the
vatican and all that is 'wise' convened for a few years of merriment
to decide that they were going to abolish "limbo".
Anyway... after finishing D'Souza's book "What's So Good about
Christianity" last weekend, I can honestly say that I STILL DON'T
KNOW. It was a very good book and he had some really interesting
arguments against some of the "famous" atheist's (harris, dennett,
dawkins, hitchens) claims and complaints but he didn't really offer me
anything that is 'SO GOOD' about his deal and he certainly didn't
change my views about much at all. Good food for thought, but thinking
ain't never gonna make this person a Christian.
So, I'm still working through it. Matthew isn't speaking yet and he
probably doesn't understand a lot, although he is a very happy baby
and smiles/laughs very much more than he cries. I can only chalk that
up to the very fact that he DOESN'T understand very much yet. Maybe
it's because his dad is so funny... looking. It's that or possibly
he's already located "the lord" in a realm that I don't have access
to.
As Walter, believing in belief, but not so much for me.
paul
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