[lit-ideas] Re: Sunday Twofer
- From: David Ritchie <ritchierd@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Sun, 5 Sep 2010 12:40:30 -0700
i pruned the fruit trees last winter
in hope of something edible
it looks as though the pears are growing too high up
and the apples
originally from sardinia maybe or austria or britain even
open parenthesis warning weak historical joke cresting the horizon
close parenthesis have signed the treaty of worms
gather up the windfalls i tell the girls
they look at me
what's a windfall
i explain what i know
and then we get out the dictionary
distracted for a moment by the term windfucker
which is a kind of kestrel or hawk
quote the kistrilles or windfuckers that filling themselves with winde,
fly against the winde evermore unquote
we settle to the puzzle of how fruit damaged by a fall
came to be synonymous with an unexpected good
an inheritance or profit
maybe they thought
where there's a will
there's worms
A spokesman for the Department for Business, Innovation and Skills,
responsible for regulation of cold calling, said it was a case of
"striking a balance between allowing legitimate businesses to continue
to operate and the needs of consumers".
Ullo' is you an consumah?
Speakin'
Sorry to be a bovvah, but we was wonderin' weavvuh you need a call
abaht double glazing?
Well that's noice, that is, an', as a matter of fac', I was thinking
it's a long time since I las' talked to someone about double glazing.
Makes a change from the weavvuh.
Nevah a truer word was said.
I got more pressin' needs though. I don' suppose you got any pawn-
ography by any chance, 'cos that's the other fing I miss?
You know we had some in las' Tuesdy...'ang on a minute, I'll
ask...Dot, we got any pawn-ogrphy...that stuff we got in on
Tuesdy?...No?...All gone? Where? Ludlow? What's 'appenin' in
Ludlow?...Blimey... Sorry, luv, we're right aht. So...winders?...
.... ooh, that's me cat on fire...
David Ritchie,
Portland, Oregon
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