[lit-ideas] Sunday Something
- From: David Ritchie <profdritchie@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Sun, 29 Mar 2015 22:25:12 -0700
There are some things you don't ask. And then you do. "Why," I asked the
girls, "have you decided to start laying in an inaccessible spot underneath the
hutch?"
"Well," said Appenzeller, "I spent a couple of weeks of my life trying to guard
against theft, but it turns out that in the modern world this is hard. You
leave the nest for a couple of minutes and wouldn't you know... some low-life
has snuck in and taken the lot."
"Really?"
Rocky joined the conversation, "It's a problem. We worried."
Cheddar came up, "Can't have all your eggs in one basket. Stands to reason."
Peccorino, "We talked about installing a security system."
I figured I'd take advantage of my slightly privileged position, "Which
consists of what?"
Mimo, "Well, that would be telling."
I worried that, despite my sleight of hand at bread-time, they'd figured out
that I'm the reverse of Santa Claus. But no. Mimo whispered, "We suspect a
rat." I nodded, "They can be a problem."
"So," said Appenzeller, "we came up with this idea...and we can only tell you
because you're a god...spread the risk; some eggs here and some, well...you
know..."
"No," I said, hoping to solve a mystery, "I'm not sure I do. Where?"
Sotto voce, Cheddar revealed the secret, "In Germany."
If only I knew where Germany was.
the thing you notice about running water is that it's not running as we
understand running it should be called flowing or pouring water or water that
is coming in ways that we approve of on rocks it pounds like our feet upon the
ground but there's nothing of the knee in that fall running water obeys gravity
like a slave it yes and no sirs in ways that knees never will there's a
stoicism about water that goes with human running i don't see in water though
when i take a moment or two to reflect and we'll note that this is one of the
things running water cannot do when i take a moment or two to reflect i think
on what time scale is that which made the rock curve or shrink not patient it
absorbs the bullying of nature and still gives a good account of itself a
counterpunch? What ho water! Bet on you! when they say these colors don't run
they reckon without water it is what makes the stalagmite and the tide water
moves and endures even on mars where there's no running in corridors water can
make colors run no problemo
i can report the walrus said having talked far near and wide of shoes and ships
and sealing wax and the price of buffalo hide and how vertiginous has been the
drop in speakers' fees and how one's thighs do chafe when riding the circuit
round and when the tide's clamor causeth us to don the lord's armor let us
hopeth it giveth somewhat in the straps around the girth with the horn a cry
doth come in that moon she alone will with any degree of certainty be able to
say how breathy are the three toed sloths how milky will be the current's
coconut's doings and when behemoth finally hoves into view late as usual she is
bright and will be able to declare what it is that most women know
ten years and it's time to call the house re-newing guy i'm surprised our gps
hasn't dialed the number to say hello and sorry we detect signs in your pipes
and so on that there's decay visible and insurance has sent texts concerning
the roof and drainage so not basic service probably a major i ask what will be
the cost approximately two days minimum they say with bot scheduling and off
gassing but it'll be worth it when you see the results and of course there's
the peace of mind and a six to ten year guarantee depending on the plan i ask
whether gutters can be cleaned and tried to include the small hole in the
driveway's tarmac but they were firm firmer than the driveway they offered to
include cleaning our european masters but i declined assuming the bots weren't
yet that skilled
David Ritchie,
Portland, Oregon
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