[lit-ideas] Re: Smart ass jokes

  • From: John McCreery <john.mccreery@xxxxxxxxx>
  • To: Lit-Ideas <lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Thu, 10 Oct 2013 08:48:41 +0900


There is more philosophy to be found here than in the usual martini.


On Thu, Oct 10, 2013 at 8:33 AM, Mike Geary <gearyservice@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:

> 1. Jean-Paul Sartre is sitting at a French cafe revising his draft of
> Being and Nothingness.  He says to the waitress, "I'd like a cup of coffee,
> please, with no cream."  The waitress replies, "I'm sorry, Monsieur, but
> we're out of cream. How     about with no milk?"               {phattmatt}
> 2. "Is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me?"          {guitartard}
> 3. Entropy isn't what it used to be.                      {inwalshe89}
> 4. A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting.  The
> biologist shoots at a deer and misses 5 ft. to the left, the chemist takes
> a shot and misses 5 ft. to the right, the statistician yells "We got 'em!"
>       {Arcadian5656}
> 5. There are two types of people in the world:  Those who can extrapolate
> from incomplete data sets      {cynognathus:}
> 6. There are two types of people in the world: Those who crave closure
>     {skullturf}
> 7. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?  He's 0K
> now.    {the breadlord}
> 8. The programmer's wife tells him: "Run to the store and pick up a loaf
> of bread.  If they have eggs, get a dozen."  The programmer comes home with
> 12 loaves of bread.         {android47}
> 9. A logician's wife is having a baby.  The doctor immediately hands the
> newborn to the dad.  His wife asks impatiently: "So, is it a boy or a
> girl"?  The logician replies: "yes".    {jdefaver}
> 10. If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
>   (LaChupacabras}
> 11. A Buddhist monk approaches a hotdog stand and says "Make me one with
> everything."       {SpookyStairs}
> 12. What do you call two crows on a branch?  Attempted murder.
>  {flamebrockade}
> 13. C, E flat, and G walk into a bar.  The bartender says, "Sorry, no
> minors."     {Mkewl}
> 14.  The bartender says,"We don't serve time travellers in here."
>        A time traveller walks into a bar.
>           {Erroneous Rex}
> 15.  Wife walks in on husband, a string theorist, in bed with another
> woman.  He shouts, "I can explain everything!"          {newloaf}
> 16.  How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?    A fish
>                     {StickleyMan}
>      .
> *******************************************************************************************
> from http:
> thoughtcatalog.com/2013/50-people-on-the-most-intellectual-joke-i-know/
> edited and submitted by Mike Geary (rhymes with weary, not with fairy --
> not that there's anything wrong with that)

John McCreery
The Word Works, Ltd., Yokohama, JAPAN
Tel. +81-45-314-9324

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