• From: "Lawrence Helm" <lawrencehelm@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: <lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Sat, 3 May 2008 09:31:44 -0700



It sounds bizarre to worry about the weather.    I suppose some of the local
channels have weather segments, but they are at the end and easily dispensed
with because out here in the Southwest no one cares.   Weather isn't
interesting because it is always the same, well not quite the same but
nearly.  It fluctuates between warm and hot.  No, that's not true either.
Sometimes the weather drops down into the 60s during the winter and we call
that "cold."   As to rain, we do have that from time to time, but not much
of it.   The only reason it is interesting is the we don't know how to drive
in it.  As soon as our streets get a little wet, cars go skidding all over
the place.  We have traffic jams galore.  


Now, here in San Jacinto we do get some high winds.  I personally have had
some trees blown down.  But that doesn't raise any alarms. No one declares
weather on the news.   Last year, or maybe it was the year before, we had a
bit of a dust storm that was a nuisance.  


Sometimes Susan will ask me how hot it is going to be so she will know what
to wear and I'll go searching for the weather.  It's always the same, warm
to hot, but if I say 72 to her she will dress more warmly than if I say 85.


It gets cooler at night of course, but everyone is all covered up snugly by
then and not caring.  


What we do have that makes the news is earthquakes.  Those get reported,
especially anything over 5, but we already know it because we've felt it and
only turn on the news to find out how far away it was and whether there was
any damage.  Usually there isn't.  


Lawrence, Sunny, High 79 degrees


From: lit-ideas-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx [mailto:lit-ideas-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx]
On Behalf Of Mike Geary
Sent: Friday, May 02, 2008 9:18 PM
To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx


I'm curious.  Do the local TV stations where you (Lit-Id listers) live, stop
the world when there are severe weather warnings?  Here in Memphis severe
weather in spring and fall are not uncommon, are expected in fact.  It's
part of the fun of living here.  But our idiot TV news/program directors not
only get the tornado-giddies, ("could this be the time it really happens?")
-- we all get that -- but they pre-empt all programs -- especially national
news programs -- to show weather radar images for hours on end, as
weather-readers blather the same blather they've been blathering for hours.
They take the radar down to a specific street, each pixel multiplied a
hundred thousand times and each screaming weather severity in blood red
gore.  "See there, see?  It's raining on Parade Avenue."   They study the
radar images for the "tell-tale hook echo" that signifies a possible
tornado.  Try to decide if this thing here is a hook or just a false return.
They have fun those weather people do, getting all that face time which is
like double overtime.  "Tornados been veddy, veddy good to me."  I've lived
an inordinate number of years here and I've never seen a tornado.  There was
a period long ago when I was certain tornadoes were searching for me.  I
sought out places to hide.  I used to think of tornadoes as the twisting
finger of God searching me out.  But that was a rough period and long ago.
Now I rip open my shirt and with my bare my chest as a clear target shout:
"Here I am, God.  Bring it on!"


Still no tornadoes.  Some exciting as hell winds, thunder storms loud as
goddam Heavy Metal concerts and complete with electrifying lightshows.  But
no damage to me yet, in all these years, nothing more damaging than
cancelled picnics.  Actually, I love the storms we have here.  Seattle is so
woosie in its weather.  The Weather here is manly and commands an uppercase
'W'.  More than manly, it's GORILLA.  But that's no excuse to cancel the
news that I use for target practice -- spitting at the screen.  I've gotten
good.  Can sometimes hit the person I'm aiming at.  


I'll bet Julie K, who lives here in the middle of the country where the
weather patterns meet and compete, is the only lister who can testify that
what I say is true.  I'll bet severe weather would take precedence over a
President's assassination where she lives too.  I get furious.  I write
highly insulting emails to the program directors.  To no avail.  Inveighing,
I go (to steal a  William Buckley pun -- even though I'm a pacifist, I
always wanted to belt Buckley, he hailed from the land of ilk and money,
which should not be confused with a world that is real).


Mike Geary


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