[lit-ideas] Re: Going Canadian
- From: Eric Yost <NYCEric@xxxxxxxxxx>
- To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Wed, 08 Dec 2004 00:08:00 -0500
So what do the Canadians go? Go to Italy, put on a Bush shirt, and annoy
everyone, just to get them even more angry at the Americans?
_____
In his usual brilliant and concise fashion, Andreas has solved the
problem of universal anti-Americanism. The way out does not lead through
denial or camouflage, but through direct, hyperbolic confrontation with
anti-Americans in the non-American street.
An "America; Love It or Leave It!" T-shirt may seem out of place in
Zandhoven or Trieste, but that would only be the beginning of the Bubba
invasion.
Scholars, bohemians, intellectuals, artists, honeymooners, and
scientists have no business leaving America. Many need to be
re-Americanized anyway.
A different ambassador is needed. The US should empty its trailer parks
and urban hellscapes and send the whole bunch packing to Europe and
other destinations overseas. Establish a federal trust find. Give 'em
all a one-way passport, a Bush T-shirt, a bait box full of
nightcrawlers, and let 'em loose.
Ugly Americans ... pfaw ... little do these innocent foreigners know.
All we need is a change in currency conversion rates and we'll go teach
those foreigners how to do things right. Soon there'll be bass fishing
in the Rhine and locals will pine for the good old days of Hawaiian
shirts and cameras.
Thanks Andreas! By virtue of copying President Bush on this reply, I am
nominating you as the person best qualified to organize and lead this
vast cultural migration.
Yours in Kleist,
Eric
cc: L-I, AR, D, Max Frisch
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