[lit-ideas] Re: English Pubic Schools

  • From: "Andy Amago" <aamago@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Date: Thu, 16 Feb 2006 22:17:19 -0500

> [Original Message]
> From: Paul Stone <pas@xxxxxxxx>
> To: <lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
> Date: 2/16/2006 9:44:47 PM
> Subject: [lit-ideas] Re: English Pubic Schools
>
>
> >The only thing that works for you.  Not everyone hits their animals.  For
> >the record, I have never hit my animals.  I can't even imagine hitting a
> >cat.
>
> It only takes ONE hit. Really remarkable. They don't have memory for 
> shit, but they have a remarkable memory for a slap on the ass. 


With humans it all winds up in the unconscious.  Yeah, we love our parents
but we can't stay in a relationship because we learned relationships hurt. 
Or, we love our parents but we drink, or are passive aggressive with a boss
or have anxiety or depression or whatever.  I know you don't believe it,
but that doesn't change the dynamic.


I 
> never bruised them. I never maimed them. I tapped 'em on the butt. 
> You are governed by an all or nothing mentality. You can't IMAGINE 
> eating 1 steak every month. You can't imagine smacking a cat once in 
> a lifetime. You have no grip on reality. You are the type of person 
> who paves the road to Hell.
>

Cats are tiny, how could you hit a cat?  My cat just today looked like she
was going to bite the cord on the electric blanket.  I touched her,
literally touched her and said in a regular voice, what are you doing?
Let's go, come on.  She looked at me, all but smiled, and we walked out of
the room together.  I have NEVER had a problem with her.  And I have NEVER
hit her.  Technically, yeah, I guess I can imagine a lot of things, but I'd
rather not.


> >   Animal trainers don't hit animals.
>
> Animal trainers are weirdos. They are psychotic abusers of wild animals.
>

Animal trainers love their animals.  Horses are a different story.  For
some reason horse trainers do abuse horses.  Not all trainers, but I have
heard of it.  It's very sad.


> >I'm sorry it's the only thing that works for you.
>
> The thing is, it works. I'm sorry you don't understand that.
>


Lots of things work.  I do it my way, you do it yours.




> >It's the same reason spanking "works" for parents, because they 
> >don't know there's a better way, and they don't know the
> >consequences of spanking.
>
> Of course they do. The "consequences" as you put it are that in the 
> short term, the kid straightens up and in the long term, with 
> moderated discipline, the kid learns not to fuck around. You are over 
> the edge with your touchy-feely approach.
>


The consequences wind up in the unconscious, the thing you don't believe
in.  The kid straightens up, but the fact is, if you hit somebody, they'll
hate you.  It's that simple.  


> >And they don't want to know.  Hey, maybe someday you'll visit 
> >someone's house and you won't wipe your feet before walking in
> >and they'll give you a nice firm ass smack.  Then, if you don't put 
> >the glass in the dishwasher, you'll get another nice firm ass smack.  And
> >another.  And another.  Eventually you'll get the idea on how things 
> >are supposed to be done over there.
>
> You're being completely ridiculous. I won't need an ass smack. I 
> learned to do these things when i was a kid and i NEEDED to learn. 
> You better revisit your psychohistory. Tell me what do you do if your 
> kid doesn't put his glass in the dishwasher for the 50th time? 



Maybe the kid is telling you something.  Maybe he's depressed.  Maybe he's
being bullied in school.  Maybe that's the only way he knows to get
attention.  Maybe a lot of things.  But don't worry about why he's not
listening, just beat him and he'll do what you want.


Do you 
> raise your voice? Do you use an expletive? Do you deprive him of 
> something? What IS the solution? 


Having a relationship, like in having fun with him, playing basketball,
doing some FUN interactive thing on a regular basis.  Giving him
responsibility he can handle and making him feel good about himself.  It's
an approach that's foreign to a huge chunk, as in most, of the world.


What about if he's going to step in 
> front of a bus? 


Is he suicidal, is that what you're saying?  All the more reason to stop
with the spanking crap and start with the relating.


Do you yank him back or quietly say "progeny, please 
> don't..." at which point the bus runs him down!!!
>
> tough times, demand tough talk
>


Or, it takes a man to be a dad, depending on how you look at it.  Being a
man means protecting the little guy, not terrorizing him/her.



> p
>
>
>
>
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