[lit-ideas] Costello Calls to buy a computer from Abbott

  • From: JimKandJulieB@xxxxxxx
  • To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Date: Fri, 6 Jan 2006 04:43:04 EST

    

"COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM  ABBOTT*  
ABBOTT: Super  Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an  office in my den and  I'm 
thinking about
buying a  computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name's  Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I  want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name's  Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy  in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with  Windows?

COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the  
windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows.  I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for  Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to  write 
proposals
track expenses and run my business. What do you  have?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you  recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did  what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended  something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT:  Yes.

COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT:  Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office  with Windows.

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's  just 
say I'm
sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What  do I 
need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT:  Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is  office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which  word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the  blue "W".

COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start  with 
some
straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have  
anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT:  Money.

COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

ABBOTT:  Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes  bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What's bundled with my  computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my  computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle  of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One  copy.

COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft  gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to  copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days  later)

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help  you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click  on "START".......


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