LOL!! > Sweeping or Tomatoes > > An unemployed recovering alcoholic is desperate to support his family. His > wife watches TV all day and his three teenage kids have dropped out of > high school to hang around with the local toughs. He applies for a > janitor's job at a large firm and easily passes an aptitude test. > > The human resources manager tells him, "You will be hired at minimum wage > of $5.15 an hour. Let me have your e-mail address so that we can get you > in the loop. Our system will automatically e-mail you all the forms and > advise you when to start and where to report on your first day." > > Taken back, the man protests that he is poor and has neither a computer > nor an e-mail address. To this the manager replies, "You must understand > that to a company like ours that means that you virtually do not exist. > Without an e-mail address you can hardly expect to be employed by a > high-tech firm. Good day." > > Stunned, the man leaves. Not knowing where to turn and having $10 in his > wallet, he walks past a farmers' market and sees a stand selling 25 lb. > crates of beautiful red tomatoes. He buys a crate, carries it to a busy > corner and displays the tomatoes. In less than 2 hours he sells all the > tomatoes and makes 100% profit. Repeating the process several times more > that day, he ends up with almost $100 and arrives home that night with > several bags of groceries for his family. > > During the night he decides to repeat the tomato business the next day. > By the end of the week he is getting up early every day and working into > the night. He multiplies his profits quickly. Early in the second week > he acquires a cart to transport several boxes of tomatoes at a time, but > before a month is up he sells the cart to buy a broken-down pickup truck. > > At the end of a year he owns three old trucks. His two sons have left > their neighborhood gangs to help him with the tomato business, his wife is > buying the tomatoes, and his daughter is taking night courses at the > community college so she can keep books for him. > > By the end of the second year he has a dozen very nice used trucks and > employs fifteen previously unemployed people, all selling tomatoes. He > continues to work hard. Time passes and at the end of the fifth year he > owns a fleet of nice trucks and a warehouse which his wife supervises, > plus two tomato farms that the boys manage. The tomato company's payroll > has put hundreds of homeless and jobless people to work. His daughter > reports that the business grossed a million dollars. > > Planning for the future, he decides to buy some life insurance. Consulting > with an insurance adviser, he picks an insurance plan to fit his new > circumstances. Then the adviser asks him for his e-mail address in order > to send the final documents electronically. > > When the man replies that he doesn't have time to mess with a computer and > has no e-mail address, the insurance man is stunned, "What, you don't have > e-mail? No computer? No Internet? Just think where you would be today if > you'd had all of that five years ago!" > > "Ha!" snorts the man. "If I'd had e-mail five years ago I would be > sweeping floors at Microsoft and making $5.15 an hour." > > Which brings us to the moral of this story: > > Since you got this by e-mail, you're probably closer to being a janitor > than a millionaire. Sadly, since I sent it by e-mail, I'm right there > with you. Phiebs (Mat Thomas) e | Phiebs@xxxxxxx m | 07931 357 651 w | http://www.lanse.co.uk