[guide.chat] jokes
- From: "Stanley Carter" <stanleycarter3@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: "guide chat" <guide.chat@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Sun, 18 Mar 2012 18:53:49 -0000
good news for smokers. clinical tests have shown that if you smok
eigaarettes it dramatically reduces your risk developing alzheirmer's
disease-you drop dead be fore you get a chance to get it
harrey finally managed to stop smoking he discovered that the only way was
to control his cravings was buy continuously chewing on toothpicks sadly
he later died of dutch elm disease
harry wants to give up smorking but is very week-willed finally his wife
gives him an ultimatum he'll get no sex untel he gives up harry discusses
this development with is friend bill
so how long can you hold out ?
aske bill ,not sure replied harry
i suppose until she dies and i remarry or get repetitive strain injury
marrey won't to help her husband give up cigarettes she ask her friend
june for advice june suggests that mary limits her husband's smoking to
post-sex cigerette
mary decides to give it a go and tells her husband that in future he can
only smorke a sigarette after making love a week later june meets mary
in the street mary is slowly hobbling down the road on a bow-legs
using two canes to support herself you look terrible .
says june what happend to you?
i took your advice about the smoking replied mary but so far i've only
been to get him down to 20 a day
to help me with my smoking problem i have been using passive smorking
patchhes you stic them on other people
smuggling
a man rides up to the border on is bicycle he as two large bags over is
shoulders the border guard stop's him
what's in the bags ? he asks
sand says the man the guard asks the man to hand the bags' over
for inspection the guard empties the bags out but finds nothing but sand
he sends the man on is way a week later the same man cycles up to the border
again like last time he as two bags slung over is shoulder what's have you
got in the bags ?ask the guard sand says the man the guard examines the bags
again and finds they contain nothing but sand he gives the bags back to the
man and sends him on is way this gose on every week for three years finally
the man stops appearing at the border crossing years go by and the border guard
eventually retites one day he's walking through a nearby town when he sees
the man sitting in a caffee hey says the guard
i remember you i'm sure you were smuggling someing thing through my crossing
station i'm positive you were but i never figured out what your angle
was it used to drive me cazy just betwewn you and me were you smuggling
stuff ?
yes says the man hah
says the guard
i knew it but i always searched you so thoroughly what on earth were you
smumggling?
the man replied bicycles
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