[cinci_dads] Fw: cute

  • From: "Dan Zavon" <dzavon@xxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: "Audrey Whitman" <audrey.whitman@xxxxxxxxxxx>, "Stay-at-home Dads Cincinnati" <cinci_dads@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>, "Bernie Markstein" <BMarkstein2@xxxxxxx>
  • Date: Thu, 10 Nov 2005 19:39:10 -0500

 Eight Words with two Meanings
> >
> > 1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
> > Female...... Any part under a car's hood.
> > Male..... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.
> >
> > 2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
> > Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
> > Male.... Playing football without a cup.
> >
> > 3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
> > Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
> > Male... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the
boys.
> >
> > 4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
> > Female.... A desire to get married and raise a family.
> > Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.
> >
> > 5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
> > Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
> > Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.
> >
> > 6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
> > Female.... An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
> > Male...... A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.
> >
> > 7 MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
> > Female...... The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
> > Male.. Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.
> >
> > 8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
> > Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
> > Male... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.
> > AND;
> >
> > He said . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put
> > in
> > it.
> > She said . . . You wear pants don't you?
> >
> > He said . . ..... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
> > She said That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit
> > on
> > the sofa and fart!
> >
> > He said . ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave
> > you?
> > She said . .....Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
> >
> > He said . . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
> > She said . . We don't know; it has never happened.
> >
> > He said . . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring
and
> > Good- looking?
> > She said ...... . . They already have boyfriends.
> >
> > She said...What do you call a women who knows where her husband is every
> > night?
> > He said . . . A widow.
> >
> > He said . . . Why are married women heavier than single women?
> > She said . . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go
to
> > bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

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