?The Chatterbox? An online journal of a Carolina Wren 11/14/05 Note: this entry is a special report based, in part, on a true story. Teakettle! Teakettle! Teakettle! Cheet! Cheet! Cheet! ? ?first an update on some old business. I?m still in a heavy battle with the Yellow-breasted Chats over the name of my online journal. We spent most of the spring and summer in intense litigation with no resolution. They?re real stubborn birds (and real loud mouths!) but they are gone now until next spring. Safe until then! OK?now the news? (Teakettle! Teakettle! Teakettle!) ? sorry! Coming over from the birds on the wire this morning is a story of a human (of all things!) helping one of our own escape captivity. Apparently the curiosity of an after hatching year Carolina Wren got the best of him when he flew into a building near the downtown area in Johnson City, TN. This young bird is believed to have flown into the building late last night or early this morning. This building is the home to all kinds of neat looking paper and envelopes that are gathered together before they are taken somewhere else. These human rituals are so confusing! According to reports, this human was a key component to the young wren escaping. A few notes here: First, Carolina Wrens are no where near as easily ?domesticated? (if that is the right word) as our cousins the House Wren so something like this happens a bit less. This thing is a bit more common for them, but it does happen to us from time to time being urbanites. We are constantly criticized by our other cousins ? Sedge and Marsh Wren for not being ?wild enough.? But I digress? Excuse me a second there another alert coming from the birds on the wire? Teakettle! Teakettle! Teakettle! Cheet! Cheet! Cheet! Teakettle! Teakettle! Teakettle! Cheet! Cheet! Cheet! Teakettle! Teakettle! Teakettle! Cheet! Cheet! Cheet! Teakettle! I knew it! Cheet! This makes me so mad! Cheeeet! Humans can?t be trusted! Cheeeeeeeet! According to an eye witness this human wasn?t trying to save our fellow brethren at all! Not unless you include scaring the bird poop out of him and causing him bodily harm. Reports go on to say he caused the young bird to hit a Great Clear Barrier (I hate those!). He then trapped him on the ground and then tortured him causing him great stress. It was only by sheer luck that he was able to escape. Let?s now join the press conference already in progress. The old wise wren is already speaking? The human has been identified as one Robert Beeler. At least that is as closest spelling our humanologist can get. Apparently he works for the local human government and is a member of ?what? Oh no, not one of those, err?a member of two local clubs that watches us. Our human watchers put him in south Johnson City in the morning and west Johnson City in the afternoons. As a reminder, not many humans pay any attention to us, but this one is suspected to be well aware of our presence. Extreme caution is to be used if you see this human. Now the young wren that was attacked will now make a few statements. Hello, forgive me if I get upset, my head is still killing me and is not exactly right. I was so scared. I didn?t mean to go into the building but I was flying along, minding my own business and I could?ve sworn I saw another bird in the building. But it was a cruel trick with a smooth surface that fooled me. But not nearly as cruel of a trick as what this Beeler human did to me! Cheet! Cheet! Cheet! At first it was OK, he opened some doors?I mean kept them open! They had been opening all morning but not staying that way. I thought as soon as no one was looking, I would zip out one of the opened doors. I was content to stay in my little corner, perched on the coverings for the Great Clear Barrier. That is when the human turned on me. Next thing I knew he was pointing at me so other human could see and started coming at me with this giant flat weapon. I don?t know if he thought I was a big fly he could squash, but I wasn?t going to hang around to find out. I flew out of the corner as fast as I could, flying over his head. Then I cut back the way I came but during all this confusion I got turned around and lost my direction. I thought I saw a clear way out and made a dash for it. Last thing I remember before realizing that I was on the ground was the thud as I hit the Great Clear Barrier. When I was younger, my mom told me about the Clear Barriers but I thought ! she must have been crazy. Anyway?when I came to, I saw this huge hand come over me. It was dark and I was disoriented again but still I fought to get free. I fought and fought but he still managed to get a hold of me. I thought I was a goner so I played Opossum, buying my time until I was outside because I knew he only had to squeeze and I would have been a goner. Once outside I gave one last desperate effort to escape. It miraculously worked and I escaped to the nearest tree. I?ve never been so scared in all my life! This guy must be stopped! Thank you for your time. Ok?I am back. Here at Chatterbox Central. Cheet! Teakettle! Teakettle! That was the young victim of the increasingly growing threat of humans to our avian kingdom. Any further information you may have may be sent to chatterbox@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx . I will update this online journal when more information becomes available. End entry. Rob Biller Elizabethton, TN ************************************************* BRISTOL BIRDS NET LIST Bristol Birds Net Photo Gallery located at: http://f2.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/jwcoffeyy/album?.dir=/efd5 This is a regional birding list sponsored by the Bristol Bird Club to facilitate communications between birders and bird clubs of Southwest Virginia and Northeast Tennessee. -------------------------------------------------- You are subscribed to Bristol-Birds. 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