Now this raises Garrison Keillor back to a place high up on the Tower
of Wit and Humor.
Thanks for sharing.
Carl Jarvis
On 2/23/17, Miriam Vieni <miriamvieni@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
I think this is really funny.
Miriam
Keillor writes: "The Lord is my shepherd. Okay? Totally. Big league. He is
a
tremendous shepherd. The best. No comparison. I know more than most people
about herding sheep. And that's why I won the election in a landslide."
President Donald Trump. (photo: Rex Features/AP)
<https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/blessed-are-the-winners-big-league/
2017/02/21/9d3f3e68-f855-11e6-bf01-d47f8cf9b643_story.html?utm_term=.b1fa129
1de02>
Blessed Are the Winners. Big League.
By Garrison Keillor, The Washington Post
23 February 17
The Lord is my shepherd. Okay? Totally. Big league. He is a tremendous
shepherd. The best. No comparison. I know more than most people about
herding sheep. And that’s why I won the election in a landslide, and it’s
why my company is doing very, very well. Because He said, “I’m with you,
Donald. You will never want.”
So we were on this green pasture by the still waters and He said, “Lie
down.” I said, “Lie down?” He said, “Lie down.” And He made me lie down.
Right there in the pasture. So I lie down. People are so surprised that I
lie down — “Oh, he’s lying down.” But He’s my shepherd. Great shepherd. Not
just good. Great. It was right there that I thought, “This is going to be a
tremendous golf course. Terrific greens. Plenty of water.” And it is.
Everybody who plays it comes away saying, “That is the greatest course in
the entire world.” Everybody.
So He was saying to me, Blessed are the dealmakers, for theirs is the
kingdom. Big time. Blessed are they who scorn, for they shall be
comfortable. Blessed is machismo, for it wins again and again. Blessed are
they who are persecuted by the dishonest press, for they shall continue
down
the paths of righteousness, and that’s what is going on here. We are
bringing righteousness to Washington for the first time and making
incredible progress. I’ve done more in the past month than most presidents
do in a year. Washington was without form and void and I issued an
executive
order, “Let there be light,” and did I get credit for it? No, the dishonest
press said, “It hurts our eyes.” So I divided the light from the darkness.
Day and night. Night and day. I did all this in two nights and a day. Under
deadline, under budget. Next week we’re going to do the firmament, the
waters, the dry land, start naming beasts, all the rest of it.
I tell you, I have been walking through the valley of the shadow of death.
The shadow of death. I have to say that. Terrible. Because of the dishonest
Medianites, or, as I call them, the media
<https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2017/02/16/donald-trumps-gri
evance-filled-press-conference-annotated/?utm_term=.36f415ee19c9> ,
including a lot of you here in this room, writing stories about chaos.
Where’s the chaos? We’ve got light and darkness, day and night. There is no
chaos. I know what’s true and the level of dishonesty is unbelievable. The
story about the rich man in hell and the beggar Lazarus in heaven — fake
news. Totally fake. Rich man wouldn’t give him the crumbs off his table?
Not
true. Never happened. “What shall it profit a man if he gain the whole
world
and lose his own soul? <http://biblehub.com/kjv/mark/8-36.htm> ” He never
said it. Same with <http://biblehub.com/matthew/19-24.htm> “It is easier
for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to get
into the kingdom of heaven.” Garbage. Total garbage.
I am not a bad person. You don’t get to 306 electoral votes by being a bad
person. So I wish you could write something nice, but maybe you can’t and
that’s okay, too. I can live with that because I fear no evil: for the Lord
is with me; and my staff has been a great comfort to me. Tremendous people.
Because I know good from bad. Okay? I inherited a mess, the instability,
divisiveness, darkness, iniquity, leprosy, madmen, but nonetheless the Lord
has prepared a tremendous table before me in the presence of my enemies.
Beautiful table. Steaks, seafood, tremendous wines, anything I want, and
here I am with goodness and mercy <http://biblehub.com/psalms/23-6.htm>
following me every single day of my life, not just mercy but goodness, too,
and we’re making tremendous progress, great numbers getting bigger every
day, multitudes gathering everywhere I go, touching the hem of my garment,
but the media is still bitter about Hillary losing in a landslide and the
Lord anointing my head with oil, which people make fun of and that’s okay,
let them laugh at my hair, I got 306 electoral college votes
<https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/fact-checker/wp/2017/02/16/fact-checkin
g-president-trumps-news-conference/?utm_term=.bb4b6e6f668c> . They said
there’s no way to get 222. No way, José. I got 306. That’s what I call the
cup running over. Filled the cup and then it ran over. The overflow was
tremendous. Huge overflow. Biggest overflow ever. Fantastic. Through the
ceiling. Stock market up. Good jobs. You name it.
So it looks like I am going to be dwelling in the house of the Lord forever
and I’m having a good time. I love this. I am having fun.
<http://e-max.it/posizionamento-siti-web/socialize>
Error! Hyperlink reference not valid.Error! Hyperlink reference not valid.
President Donald Trump. (photo: Rex Features/AP)
https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/blessed-are-the-winners-big-league/2
017/02/21/9d3f3e68-f855-11e6-bf01-d47f8cf9b643_story.html?utm_term=.b1fa1291
de02https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/blessed-are-the-winners-big-leag
ue/2017/02/21/9d3f3e68-f855-11e6-bf01-d47f8cf9b643_story.html?utm_term=.b1fa
1291de02
Blessed Are the Winners. Big League.
By Garrison Keillor, The Washington Post
23 February 17
he Lord is my shepherd. Okay? Totally. Big league. He is a tremendous
shepherd. The best. No comparison. I know more than most people about
herding sheep. And that’s why I won the election in a landslide, and it’s
why my company is doing very, very well. Because He said, “I’m with you,
Donald. You will never want.”
So we were on this green pasture by the still waters and He said, “Lie
down.” I said, “Lie down?” He said, “Lie down.” And He made me lie down.
Right there in the pasture. So I lie down. People are so surprised that I
lie down — “Oh, he’s lying down.” But He’s my shepherd. Great shepherd. Not
just good. Great. It was right there that I thought, “This is going to be a
tremendous golf course. Terrific greens. Plenty of water.” And it is.
Everybody who plays it comes away saying, “That is the greatest course in
the entire world.” Everybody.
So He was saying to me, Blessed are the dealmakers, for theirs is the
kingdom. Big time. Blessed are they who scorn, for they shall be
comfortable. Blessed is machismo, for it wins again and again. Blessed are
they who are persecuted by the dishonest press, for they shall continue
down
the paths of righteousness, and that’s what is going on here. We are
bringing righteousness to Washington for the first time and making
incredible progress. I’ve done more in the past month than most presidents
do in a year. Washington was without form and void and I issued an
executive
order, “Let there be light,” and did I get credit for it? No, the dishonest
press said, “It hurts our eyes.” So I divided the light from the darkness.
Day and night. Night and day. I did all this in two nights and a day. Under
deadline, under budget. Next week we’re going to do the firmament, the
waters, the dry land, start naming beasts, all the rest of it.
I tell you, I have been walking through the valley of the shadow of death.
The shadow of death. I have to say that. Terrible. Because of the dishonest
Medianites, or, as I call them, the media
<https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2017/02/16/donald-trumps-gri
evance-filled-press-conference-annotated/?utm_term=.36f415ee19c9> ,
including a lot of you here in this room, writing stories about chaos.
Where’s the chaos? We’ve got light and darkness, day and night. There is no
chaos. I know what’s true and the level of dishonesty is unbelievable. The
story about the rich man in hell and the beggar Lazarus in heaven — fake
news. Totally fake. Rich man wouldn’t give him the crumbs off his table?
Not
true. Never happened. “What shall it profit a man if he gain the whole
world
and lose his own soul? <http://biblehub.com/kjv/mark/8-36.htm> ” He never
said it. Same with <http://biblehub.com/matthew/19-24.htm> “It is easier
for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to get
into the kingdom of heaven.” Garbage. Total garbage.
I am not a bad person. You don’t get to 306 electoral votes by being a bad
person. So I wish you could write something nice, but maybe you can’t and
that’s okay, too. I can live with that because I fear no evil: for the Lord
is with me; and my staff has been a great comfort to me. Tremendous people.
Because I know good from bad. Okay? I inherited a mess, the instability,
divisiveness, darkness, iniquity, leprosy, madmen, but nonetheless the Lord
has prepared a tremendous table before me in the presence of my enemies.
Beautiful table. Steaks, seafood, tremendous wines, anything I want, and
here I am with goodness and mercy <http://biblehub.com/psalms/23-6.htm>
following me every single day of my life, not just mercy but goodness, too,
and we’re making tremendous progress, great numbers getting bigger every
day, multitudes gathering everywhere I go, touching the hem of my garment,
but the media is still bitter about Hillary losing in a landslide and the
Lord anointing my head with oil, which people make fun of and that’s okay,
let them laugh at my hair, I got 306 electoral college votes
<https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/fact-checker/wp/2017/02/16/fact-checkin
g-president-trumps-news-conference/?utm_term=.bb4b6e6f668c> . They said
there’s no way to get 222. No way, José. I got 306. That’s what I call the
cup running over. Filled the cup and then it ran over. The overflow was
tremendous. Huge overflow. Biggest overflow ever. Fantastic. Through the
ceiling. Stock market up. Good jobs. You name it.
So it looks like I am going to be dwelling in the house of the Lord forever
and I’m having a good time. I love this. I am having fun.
http://e-max.it/posizionamento-siti-web/socializehttp://e-max.it/posizioname
nto-siti-web/socialize
