Judy, I have the same preferences you do when it comes to romances.
I'm generally not a romance fan and rarely validate them because I
don't know what I'm getting into. There are some good ones out there
though. I've stumbled upon them almost by accident. Colleen Coble
writes books that may be up your alley. They sort of blur the line
between mystery and romance. Her Rock Harbor series is good as is a
stand-alone book called Anathema. Her books are on Bookshare at
http://www.bookshare.org/web/BooksByAuthor.html?author_id=2046 I
haven't read her Aloha Reef series but plan to fix that soon. (smile)
Angela Hunt has also written some romances like this. The two I'm
thinking of are The Elevator,
http://www.bookshare.org/web/SingleTitle.html?submittitleid=46441 and
The Justice, http://www.bookshare.org/web/SingleTitle.html?submittitleid=39837
. These are romances with strong, complex heroines who don't just fall
apart when Mr. Right comes around.
Finally, for something on the lighter and funnier side, you might like
books by Claudia Mair Burney.
http://www.bookshare.org/web/BooksByAuthor.html?author_id=31859 Her
heroine, Amanda Brown, is someone I'd love to have tea and laugh with.
These books make me feel good about being a woman and having a few
gray hairs of my own. Thanks to my friend Laura Ann for giving me a
couple of nudges to check them out. (grin)
