I have a very good friend. He and I hve been good friends for about 20 years. He and I have gone lots of places together and have done lots of things together. I live on a small none working farm and he has helped me with things around here.
About 2 years ago he told me one day that he had been curious about what it might be like to walk around like I do. At his place of employment they have a walk/exercise course. He walks that course everyday.
Apparently there are a couple of straight sections. He decided he wanted to try an experiment. He got onto the straight section and closed his eyes. He tried to walk as far as he could with his eyes closed. He said his experience was very uncomfortable.
He knew that the trail had not drop off points one either side so he was safe that way. He also knew that there was nothing to run into so he was safe that way. However, he found that he could not force himself to walk more than about a dozen steps without opening his eyes.
He told me then that he knew it wouldn't be exactly the same for me because of the way I handled myself.
I personally felt appreciated in this instance. I felt that he really was interested in me if he was willing and thoughtful enough to try such a thing.
I too have had sighted people say and do some rather unpleasantthings to me. I am uncomfortable responding with other than pleasant comments. If you cut a man's head off he will never learn a better behavior.
However, I have to admit to thinking to myself that a person who does such things has to either be quite ignorant or else totally out of touch. ----- Original Message ----- From: "solsticesinger" <solsticesinger25@xxxxxxxxx>
To: <bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> Sent: Sunday, December 03, 2006 5:15 PM Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: How I read
I imagine he had quite a fabulous time stumbling around his apartment. I'm often surprised that people assume that, by blindfolding themselves for a short time, they'll get an accurate idea of how it is to be blind. If I were in an unfamiliar place, and without a cane or guide dog, I'd probably almost break my neck too.As for why people are so in awe, and feel the need to speak of it, I guess it's because sight is so central to their lives. They can't really get their heads around a life without it. So, things that we take for granted, like walking around and such, seem monumental to them.Considering that a white cane is used quite differently from a cane one would use if they had a bad knee, I find the incident you described with your friend quite humorous.ShannonAre you a fan of women's music? If so, and you're interested in hearing the latest edition of "The Eclectic Collection: A Celebration of Women In Music", feel free to send a message to:solsticesinger25@xxxxxxxxx----- Original Message ----- From: "Natalie B." <lemina007@xxxxxxxxxxx>To: <bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> Sent: Sunday, December 03, 2006 10:06 AM Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: How I readWow. I've been reading all these reactions, and I'm amazed at some of the things people have been sharing. For myself, I've had people comment to me on my blindness, but not like what I've been hearing.Personally, if I'm walking with someone, I don't mind answering their questions. I had too much of peoples ignorance in high school to not feel the need to offer whatever enlightenment I can. In high school I had a girl say to my face that I could walk around, but I was supposedly blind. So therefore she said, I must be faking it. I was so angry with that, and being the teenager I was, could think of nothing to respond to that and just walked away. Then, later in that same year, I had one of my best friends question me about my cane. I didn't take her questions very seriously until she got under the table I was sitting at and start squeezing my knee. I looked under the table and said, what in the world are you doing? And she replied, checking your knee. And I asked, uh, why? For some dumb reason, she thought that my cane was because I had a bad knee!With those two incidents, you can imagine how I feel now, as an adult, my need to answer any questions fired my way. Within reason, of course.But, I would have to say, the most frustrating incident happened not that long ago. The city-run service in which handicap people can use sent a van to pick me up. The driver was real friendly and talkative, but the whole ride home all he could talk about was how impressed he was with me, and that he was in awe of people who are blind. To this I asked, why, and he responded that I was able to walk around, go to school, and live life despite my blindness.. As subtly as I could, because I hate being rude, I told the guy that unfortunately, I don't have any choice. But he either didn't hear me or something like that, because he just kept waxing on and on about how he tried to blindfold himself once while in his apartment, and nearly broke his neck tripping over his coffee table. So, he was just amazed and impressed by blind people.My question to people like this, is, why do they say stuff like this? It's either learn to be independent and find ways to do things or stay at home, shrivel up and die.Natalie B. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." -Reinhold Niebuhr----- Original Message ----- From: "solsticesinger" <solsticesinger25@xxxxxxxxx>To: <bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> Sent: Sunday, December 03, 2006 5:10 AM Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: How I readI was standing by the door at the university, waiting for my ride, and this lady comes up to me and says, "You're so brave." I asked her why, and she said she didn't know exactly why. I just was. So, I began to wonder whether I was brave for attending grad school, or for waiting alone for a ride.I don't always have the patience to educate people either. I do try, but the role of constant educator gets old fast, especially if people are insensitive to start with.ShannonAre you a fan of women's music? If so, and you're interested in hearing the latest edition of "The Eclectic Collection: A Celebration of Women In Music", feel free to send a message to:solsticesinger25@xxxxxxxxx----- Original Message ----- From: "Lora" <loravara@xxxxxxxxxxx>To: <bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> Sent: Friday, December 01, 2006 10:49 PM Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: How I readHi E.,I completely agree. People remark on everyday tasks I take for granted, and treat them as mysterious and marvelous. I've been complimented for walkingdown stairs, for crossing streets, even for going to get my mail.And those who ask personal questions, like, "How do you get dressed for workin the morning?" don't seem to care that they're being intrusive. They think they have the right. And sometimes I just don't know how to respond. The co-worker whocomplimented me for walking down two flights of stairs angered me so much that I wanted to turn and snap at her. But every instinct demands that I beprofessional at work. Some might say I should have educated her, but Idon't always have the patience to be instructive, and sometimes I feel I have the right to be angry or frustrated. Of course, if we give into that, then we're somehow angry about our disability, which is the furthest thing from the truth. I just don't want it to be what defines me to others, andsometimes, no matter how I try, that seems to be all they see.On a positive note, the team I'm on treats me as an equal, for better or worse. I take my turn at overtime, with the on-call pager, everything, and they know that I can get it done. I'm assigned projects, from small things to large-scale efforts that everyone will see the results of, and no onequestions my ability to complete my assigned duties. -----Original Message----- From: bksvol-discuss-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx [mailto:bksvol-discuss-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of Elizabeth and Burton Sent: Friday, December 01, 2006 9:41 PM To: bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: How I readActually that bothers me too. I am also bothered by strangers walking up to me and saying "I have never watched a blind person ((fill in the blank such as eat a salad or do some task.) I am happy to talk about myself but this is different than having no boundaries where my being blind means I am on display for the interest of others or need to interrupt what I am doing todiscuss my life with you.I am also amazed at the fact that total strangers have come up to me and asked me things about my personal life. It would never occur to me to walk up to someone and say "Do you live alone?" "Do you have children?" and such. I mean if I am having a conversation with you you might ask me that if you knew me a bit but total strangers somehow figure they have the right to askpersonal things because we are visibly disabled. E. To unsubscribe from this list send a blank Email to bksvol-discuss-request@xxxxxxxxxxxxxput the word 'unsubscribe' by itself in the subject line. To get a list ofavailable commands, put the word 'help' by itself in the subject line. To unsubscribe from this list send a blank Email to bksvol-discuss-request@xxxxxxxxxxxxxput the word 'unsubscribe' by itself in the subject line. To get a list of available commands, put the word 'help' by itself in the subject line.To unsubscribe from this list send a blank Email to bksvol-discuss-request@xxxxxxxxxxxxxput the word 'unsubscribe' by itself in the subject line. To get a list of available commands, put the word 'help' by itself in the subject line.To unsubscribe from this list send a blank Email to bksvol-discuss-request@xxxxxxxxxxxxxput the word 'unsubscribe' by itself in the subject line. To get a list of available commands, put the word 'help' by itself in the subject line.To unsubscribe from this list send a blank Email to bksvol-discuss-request@xxxxxxxxxxxxxput the word 'unsubscribe' by itself in the subject line. To get a list of available commands, put the word 'help' by itself in the subject line.-- No virus found in this incoming message. Checked by AVG Free Edition.Version: 7.5.430 / Virus Database: 268.15.4/563 - Release Date: 12/2/2006 9:59 AM
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