[bksvol-discuss] Fwd: Re: There are no stupid questions, only stupid people who ask them.

  • From: Grandma Cindy <popularplace@xxxxxxxxx>
  • To: bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Date: Mon, 4 Dec 2006 20:22:52 -0800 (PST)

I'm forwarding this from Amy, temporarily off list.
She answered me when I mentioned what our recent
onlist discussions were about and gave me permission
to post her and her friends experiences.


> >> Among my blind friends the stupid question that
> gets
> >> most of them is "how do you make love?".  My one
> >> friend asks, in reply, "Do you always make love
> with
> >> the lights on?"  The other answer I like is
> >> "beautifully".
> >>
> >> I have had to use the wheelchair or, ealier, the
> 3 -wheel "putt-putt" (my name) for many years and
> have gotten equally stupid questions or presumptuous
> >> ones.  Children can ask me anything and I don't
> mind  because they really want to know.  They don't
 understand about things like white canes, seeing
> eye dogs, wheelchairs, etc.
> >>
> >> However, when someone rudely asks my why I am in
> >> "that",  my answer, stolen from a good friend, is
> >> "Everyone has to be somewhere."  Many years ago I
> >> had to wear a neck collar as well as using a cane
> >> and one of the other Grad students asked me about
> >> the collar and I answered that my neck had
> >> disappeared and I was hiding the hole. I also
> >> explained the cane as a defensive weapon to
> control
> >> my overly-ardent suitors. Stupidity and rudeness
> >> don't deserve polite answers. The grad student
> not
> >> so subtly suggested that I used the cane to get
> >> sympathy.
> >>
> >> People react towards the accutrements of
> disability
> >> in many ways but the initial reaction is one that
> >> few realize that rhey have  had and  those who
> may
> >> try to deny it even to themselves.  The normal
> and
> >> completely understandable reaction to the signs
> of
> >> disability is a "thank God it's not me" but that
> is
> >> so repulsive to most people that it sllides off
> into
> >> the sub-conscious before they have to deal with
> it.
> >> There really should be  no guilt in the reaction
> but
> >> it is there. If we did not feel grateful that it
> is
> >> "not me" there really would be something wrong
> with us.- note I include myself. I would not want
> to be totally blind or deaf or even more disabled
> than I am. I am grateful not to be what I see but
that
> >> does not mean I don't sympathise with those who
> are.
> >> But I think those who ask the most stupid
> questions
> >> are doing so from a sense of quilt of which they
> are
> >> totally unaware. That does not mean I have to
> >> sympathise with their stupidity.
> >>
> >> Sorry.  You caught me on one of my pet peeves. I
> was
> >> sick as a child and in a wheelchair - briefly
> >> (Polio)  and had as many stupid questions and
> >> comments then to last me a lifetime without
> >> understanding the basis for them. Understanding
> does
> >> not necessarily  <obviously> make me more
> accepting.
> >>
> >>
> >> Amy
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
>
____________________________________________________________________________________
> > Do you Yahoo!?
> > Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail
> beta.
> > http://new.mail.yahoo.com
> > 
> 
> 



 
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  • » [bksvol-discuss] Fwd: Re: There are no stupid questions, only stupid people who ask them.