[bksvol-discuss] Fw: Ha! FOR LEXOPHILES

  • From: "Amy Goldring Tajalli" <agoldringtajalli@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: "bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxx" <bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Wed, 9 Aug 2006 02:30:58 -0400

I have never met a group of people, even in grad school, who would be more appreciative of this nor one more in need of a little levity

Amy





Subject: Ha! FOR LEXOPHILES


FOR LEXOPHILES (LOVERS OF WORDS):  - I thought they loved Lexus
automobiles


......................................................................

1. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.


2. A will is a dead giveaway


3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.


4. A backward poet writes inverse.


5. In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.


6. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.


7. If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.


8. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.


9. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat miner.


10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.


11. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.


12. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulted in Linoleum Blownapart.


13. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.


14. Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.


15. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.


16. A calendar's days are numbered.


17. A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine.


18. A boiled egg is hard to beat.


19. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.


20. A plateau is a high form of flattery.


21.A short fortuneteller who escaped from prison: a small medium at large.


22. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.


23. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.


24. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.


25. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.


26. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.


27. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.


28. Acupuncture: a jab well done.



NOTE: No trees were killed in the sending of this message, but a
large number of electrons were terribly inconvenienced.





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