[tri-wings] my birthday

 

Some one in here posted recently about Therapy 2.  Well this has really got
me thinking.  I posted to all of you what I would do if I had 24 hours with
my Simon about seeing him in a dream.  My birthday is this Thursday and if I
could have ANYTHING this year it would be to dream of Simon in heaven.  I
have not had a single dream of him yet.  I miss him so much.  I really hate
my birthdays anymore.  Every year for the past 6 years something tragic has
taken place on or very close to it.  This year is the worst by far Losing
himjust last month.  Guess it is silly for me to expect a birthday to be fun
because I am going to be 38, but you know it is the only day we can truly
call our own.  I just wish I could have some peace for a change on this day. 
  God gave me such a wonderful gift by blessing me with Simon.  I prayed to
hold him alive and have the chance to share him with family and the church. 
I got that and so much more which is more than many get with a trisomy
child.  But now I am asking God for just one more thing with my Simon.  I
askhim to let me see him in my sleep for my birthday.  I need to feel Simon
again.  I need to touch him or to just see how happy he is.  You see I
already know he is happy, but I want to dream of it.  So I guess what I am
asking of all of you is to please pray for this on my behalf.  It is all I
want for my birthday.  A big request I know, but I so much ache for it.  I
realize many do not dream of their precious little ones that have passed for
quite some time.  But as I said, it is my birthday.  I really am dreading
it.  I need it to be special for a change.   Please Lord, I ask you to allow
me to dream of Simon.  If I can not see him, I ask you to allow me to feel
his presence somehow.  Just let me feel how at peace he is and let me tell
him mommy loves him just once more.  Thank you Father.     Lesa   ---
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