[tri-wings] Re: Trying to cope

Hi Nikia,
   
  Congratulations on the birth of your son Jason.  I'm sorry you were only able 
to keep him with you for three days.
   
  My daughter, Jillian, died on February 27, 2006.  She had full Trisomy 13 and 
lived for 18 days.  We never expected that anything was wrong with our Jill 
either.  
   
  I'm so sorry for your pain.  I know that it is so overwhelming at times and 
seems to be too much to endure.  Take comfort that you are probably still in a 
sort of fog right now (at least I was for at least 3 months).  I sometimes wish 
I could still be living in that fog. I think it is a gift from God to protect 
you from the shock of it all.  Be very gentle with yourself. 
   
  I have six living children.  They are learning to live with the pain of 
losing their sister, and they are learning to live with grieving parents who 
lost their baby girl.  The other children provide some distraction from my 
grief, and since most children are rather self-absorbed (as they should be), 
their loss is not the same as my loss.  They are adjusting pretty well with the 
knowledge that their sister is happy in heaven.  
   
  I'm sorry your husband won't be with you for such a long time.  Especially 
when you will need eachother during this time of such devastating tragedy.  
Kalia will become even more important to you, I would think.
  Ruth (Jill's Mom (2/9/06 - 2/27/06)
  
Nikia Grant <bluelegacy_22@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:
  Hello. My name is Nikia and my husband and I lost our son, Jason, to Trisomy 
13 on September 5, 2006. Jason was born September 2 and weighed 4lbs and 14 
ounces. He was such a handsome little guy! When he was born, the doctors wisked 
him away. I never got to hold him that day or the next one. I didn't understand 
what could be wrong seeing how I went to every doctor's appointment, ate right, 
exercised, and got plenty of rest. The doctor never suspected any type of 
problems. I am really having a hard time with this. I want to be strong for my 
family, but I find it really hard at times. My husband's name is Terrence and 
we have a 2 year old named Kalia. I really want her to be okay and not see me 
being so sad all the time. She's like a sponge and picks up on every emotion 
and every action. Jason was here only 3 days and already he has had a very big 
impact on so many people in so many ways. It's amazing. I know that God doesn't 
make mistakes and we will never
understand why he had to go, still, it all hurts really bad. Worst of all, my 
husband is in the Army and he's set to be deployed in November for a whole 
year! How exactly am I supposed to deal with all this? I would appreciate if 
anyone would write me back. 
Nikia Grant
Dallas, Tx

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