[tri-wings] Re: The Child Knows - Lyn

Dear Lynn and Kaylene,
   
  Thank you so much for sharing your stories.  My tears are flowing down my 
cheeks and again I ask God "Why?" Why does it have to be his way?  I wish it 
weren't true, I wish it wasn't real.  I wish our babies were with us.   But we 
have learned to love unconditionally, that is true.  I didn't know about my 
daughter Jillian's T-13 condition until she was born, but I loved her the 
moment I saw her and I loved her more each day.  I love her more than life 
itself.
   
  Ruth (Jill's Mom (2/9/06 - 2/27/06)
   
  
Kaylene Byrne <kaylenebyrne@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
  Lynn,
What a beautiful story! Both stories have truly moved me. I am mostly a
lurker, but felt compelled to thank you for sharing your story. After my son
Mathias was born all I wanted to do was hold him, but because no one knew
what was wrong or why he was having trouble breathing that opportunity did
not present itself for sometime. When I was able to meet up with him at the
Children's hospital the day after his birth he was attached to so many
monitors and machines that holding him was difficult but do-able. While I
held him over the next few days what I knew in my heart was that I wanted to
lay him on my chest with his head on my shoulder. That is what I wanted more
than anything, but his breathing tube and feeding tube and everything else
prevented it. When the day came that all his tubes were removed and it was
just Daddy, me, and him I knew that it was my chance to lay him on my chest
and cuddle him the way I had wanted to for days. I couldn't do it though.
Something inside me wasn't ready I guess. I craddled him in my arms for a
while, then daddy did. I told my husband I needed to hold him again...I felt
time may be running out since we had no idea how long he could breathe on
his own. Finally I laid him on my lap our faces toward eachother and I asked
my husband to help me bring him up to my shoulder. Mathias seemed so frail
and even though I am a mom to his older sister it seemed I couldn't remember
if babies could be held that way. He was so relaxed in my arms and my arms
were so weak that I didn't think I could do it. But my husband helped me
support his head and laid him on my shoulder. It was how it was meant to be,
and Mathias knew that. He waited for me to follow through with what we both
needed. Curled up on my shouder with Daddy's arms around us both he took his
last breath. I think the shoulder is such a special and safe place!

Kaylene
mom to Melanie and Mathias (T-13, 2/28-3/3-2006)

>From: "LYNN DOMENICI" 
>Reply-To: tri-wings@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
>To: tri-wings@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
>Subject: [tri-wings] Re: The Child Knows
>Date: Wed, 29 Nov 2006 02:12:34 -0500
>
>
>Karen,
As he placed him on his
>shoulder Joey who had been mostly sedated and quiet let out one final cry.
>It was startling to most of us present, but I thought it fitting. He was
>letting his father know he knew he was on his shoulder the place where he
>found comfort. He had always been more vocal with his dad and even his
>laugh was reserved for his father and nobody else. I was privileged to
>hear his hearty chuckle, but could not make him do it, just Daddy. It was 
his
>gift to his father.
>Peace,
>Lynn Mom to Joey T-18 Angel (4/15/04-11/27/05) and Marina T- 21(Down
>Syndrome) 7 1/2

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