[tri-wings] Platitudes

I've been reading all the hurtful and insensitive things people have said 
regarding our children. I feel so angry and frustrated that you have had to 
listen to such -rap and I am so sorry.
It's strange that this subject has come up as I've been having a hard time 
lately because I've had contact recently with some of my husbands family. They 
said some wickedly cruel things around the time I was having Sophie and after 
her death. So cruel that I have not wanted to have any contact with them since 
(over three years). 
My father in law has been ill and so the phone calls have stared coming agian. 
We had a call from my brother in law to say that their father is ill and 
doesn't have much longer to live. We went to see my FIL and he was sitting in 
the kitchen, having a cuppa, chatting to us, having been out driving in the car 
earlier that day!!!!  This is the BIL who said that we should not have 'shown' 
Sophie to our boys (like she was some sort of monster or something). He also 
said that it wasn't that bad to loose her because her death was expected. All 
this from the 'brother' who never even came to see Sophie. I feel sorry for him 
because he missed out on seeing an angel.
My FIL also said that we should have terminated my pregnancy (I respect every 
decision but I resented him telling me that in the midst of my struggle) and 
the first thing he said to me when I saw him the day after Sophie died was 
"well, you knew it had to come". I couldn't believe I had heard right but my 
sister assured me that I did as she heard what he said too. 
I am very sorry if my father in law is ill as I wouldn't want anyone to suffer 
and I feel for my husband too but that is as far as it goes. I cannot forgive 
these people for the way they have acted and the things they have said. I want 
nothing more to do with them.
Sorry this went on longer than I wanted. Having this contact with them has made 
me think about every cruel thing that was said. Thanks for listening.
Love Sharon x 
                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
                       www.trisomyonline.org
                  Families Helping Families On-line

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