[tri-wings] Naomi, Melissa,Julie

Dear Guys

Just felt I had to write and express my sorrow at your loss and also at the 
difficulties you all are facing at the moment.

I can fully appreciate the difficulties of family relationships at a time 
like this.  I had problems myself because I felt my mother had turned the 
whole incident into a personal drama.  Some people will remember the 
problems I had with her at the beginning, but I wont go into it more now.  I 
realised she was hurting but I dont think she should have come to me to 
grieve.

But she didnt really ahve anyone else to grieve to.  Eventually she founda 
good friend and since then things have been easier for me.
But I can also see it from her side, and how hurt she was when I pushed her 
away from me and focused so much on myself.

I guess what I am trying to say is that I can see it from all sides.  
Obviously Naomi does care deeply for you all or she wouldnt even be on this 
list.  Perhaps things havent worked out perfectly foryou guys. This time of 
loss is so stressful on the whole family and it can cause rifts and problems 
between you all.

I think perhaps there are other ways of sorting this out rather than this 
way.  Everyone is hurt and hurting and the hate doesnt help.  Trust me, 
since I stopped taking it all out on my family I have been so much happier.

I am not trying to judge you, or take sides or anything.  Remember I have 
been exactly where you are.  I am just saying that perhaps this isnt the 
best way to resolve things.

Im glad to see you all on the list, its lovely to think more family members 
are getting involved.  I just hope that it helps you, rather than hurts you.

Iwill be thinking of you all.  If any of you would like to correspond with 
me off list I would be more than happy to, if any of you feel it will help.

Perhaps Naomi I could put you in touch with my mother as you are in similar 
situations?

Thinking of you.


Demi
Mummy to ickle angel Connor Adam (full T18 - 11th June 2001)





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