[tri-wings] Re: My granddaughter, Catherine Renee, born sleeping

On Apr 24, 2006, at 1:03 AM,  Pat Schexnider <pschex55@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:

> Are there any grandparents of Trisomy angels that
> could maybe e-mail me with suggestions of help?  We
> just buried our little angel, Catherine. and I am so
> worried about my daughter and her husband.  If there
> are any grandmothers out there, please contact me.
> Pat (Ma Ma to Catherine Renee).  Thanks.

Dear Pat,
I'm so sorry for your double loss.  I know the feeling of not knowing  
how to help my daughter and son-in-law deal with my granddaughter's  
birth and death in one. I was so much grieving with my daughter that  
I almost couldn't grieve for my granddaughter myself at the time.   
That is probably why I'm still here.  Hope was born still on November  
1, 2001 - not too long after 9-11.  (My s-i-l was in Pennsylvania on  
a business trip when that plane went down - about 40 miles away.)

I'm glad that you are here.  I will also respond to you personally.   
There are some terrific grandparents on the list - Thank you, Darcy.  
My daughter had found the list on Trisomy 18 during her pregnancy.  I  
also found it, but it made her very uncomfortable that I was reading  
her posts.  I finally switched to this list.  (I don't think that  
there are too many, if any, both moms and their mothers or dads on  
the list.  Maybe they all feel the same way??!!??)  I've been very  
happy here with the support.  Everyone is wonderful.  And I'm so  
sorry that you have to be here.  Paul is a grandfather who has great  
insight for us.  Hopefully, he will come on and give you words of  
wisdom, too.  There are several other wonderful grandmothers.

You are so new in your loss.  I guess right now my advice would be to  
just be around your kids.  Let them know that you are there - by  
phone if you cannot be there physically.  And give them lots of hugs,  
let them cry, and definitely talk about your granddaughter, Catherine  
Renee.  What a pretty name!  My daughter's middle name is Renee.  We  
wanted the accent over the one e.  The birth certificate people told  
us that they couldn't do that.  :**)  But we used it anyway.

Welcome!  (((((((((Pat)))))))))

Sheila Helleson
MN Grandma to Iowa and South Dakota grandchildren
Hope (T-18   11-1-1) & Alison; Cadence & Bridge
Mom to Cheryl (& Denny);  Wade (& Charity)
Wife to my complete support, Richard

"Those who wish to sing always find a song."  Swedish Proverb






                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
                       www.trisomyonline.org
                  Families Helping Families On-line

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