[tri-wings] Re: Kerstin


Kerstin,
I am so glad you wrote.  It is so strange how so many feelings can be
the same.  I have found myself longing for what I once had, the
innocence of raising a child without the fear of wondering of what if's.
I miss Zach and all the things that come with raising a child, sleepless
nights, smiles and just plain love they show you.  It makes me so sad of
the things I am missing with him.  Nicholas is a precious baby, he has
helped me heal and grieve all at the same time.  I long for the time I
didn't have with him and at the same time Zack has showed me that time
is all that I have with Nicholas and my other children.
I am still waiting for the other shoe to drop and at Christmas time and
Nicholas had meningitis, I cried Christmas eve because I thought that it
was dropping,  I don't think anyone knows how scared I was.  I knew that
Zack was there with us and watching us, that gave me peace.
Know that you are not alone, Jan warned me before hand, it was so true.
Now that it has taken me 2 days to write this I will get it sent off.:)
Amy
http://communities.msn.com/MikeandAmy


                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
                       www.trisomyonline.org
                  Families Helping Families On-line

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