[tri-wings] Re: Dealing with other people and your grief

Dear Maya,

>>I went back to my knitting night and no one said a word.  These are 
>>wonderful people who came to the funeral, etc. Is everyone waiting for my 
>>lead?  Are people just scared?

most of the time people just don't know what to say.........it's out of 
their scope of experience....I think saying nothing is better than saying 
silly things like "She's better off now" "at least you can have more babies" 
and such wonderful platitudes.  Your friends will come around give them 
time.  You never know they may be scared witless that they may come to know 
only too well what life is like without a child.... do you get my drift? 
That's why this list is soooooo important because only someone who has been 
there too can truly understand.  Even we don't KNOW how you feel because 
grief is so individual but we can definitely imagine what you and Shawn are 
going through right now.  It's still only such a short time people may be 
giving you a little breathing space and sometimes those friendships will 
never be the same, that happened to us we moved away and then lost a child 
it just served to further separate us from our friends but it sounds like 
you have some great supports in Minnesota that's so great.  How's your 
counselling going?

Don't worry about the world coming to an end tomorrow it's already tomorrow 
in Australia
Charles Schultz

"Life is like a box of chocolates you never know what you're gonna get!"
Forrest Gump's mother (wise woman)

Tracey RM/RN <'///>< Mum to Jen 21 (casual at Kmart), Louise teen angel T18 
(in heaven July 1990), Jono 17 (self-confessed computer geek - and casual at 
BI-LO), Jesse 14 (wanna-be surfer & drummer extraordinaire!) and wife to 
David my soul mate and best friend 29 years now

Our God Reigns
homepages - www.geocities.com/cuddlefishtoo/index.html
myspace - www.myspace.com/cuddlefi5h 

                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
                       www.trisomyonline.org
                  Families Helping Families On-line

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