[tri-wings] Re: Can I Still Grieve?

>>Family and friends don't seem to understand how I still feel. It feels 
>>like last week, but soon it'll be a year.

People who have not been through what we've all experienced don't understand 
at all they have no idea what our grief is like.  They can imagine but they 
can't understand.  Some people don't know what grief is like let alone the 
grief you experience after losing child.  I attended the funeral of a 21 
week fetal death in utero the other day what struck me most was the size of 
the coffin I was ok until the coffin was leaving the church..........

>>When does your pain ease? I don't think it ever will.

there isn't a second of the day goes by that I don't think of Louise but the 
pain is easier than it was especially in that first year that is still so 
raw give yourself time especially with her anniversary coming up.

>>When does you live go back  to how it use to be? I think that it never 
>>will.

well no I used to say life will go back to normal now I say life will go 
back to different nothing is ever 'normal' again IMHO.

>>We are having another baby. My  due date is March the 1st. I thought it 
>>would help and make my husband happy.  But, I don't see any change. He 
>>doesn't even mention the baby. I think
his mind  is always on Gabriella

congratulations, my pregnancy with Jono immediately after Louise went in a 
blur I don't really remember much of it and even though I was looking 
forward to the new baby I was very scared.  Give your husband time men 
grieve very differently from us and this may be his way of dealing with 
losing Gabriella and the impending anniversary.  I hope the rest of your 
pregnancy goes well keep us up-to-date.

so in answer to your initial question (Can I still grieve?) by all means 
yes, 15 years down the track sometimes I still cry big heavy tears when I 
think of Louise other times I can happily share some little memory about her 
with no trouble other times I get misty eyed.  Gabriella was/is part of your 
family and she will never be forgotten at least by you.


Don't worry about the world coming to an end tomorrow it's already tomorrow 
in Australia
Charles Schultz

"Life is like a box of chocolates you never know what you're gonna get!"
Forrest Gump's mother.

Tracey, <///>< RM/RN Mum to Jenny (18) Baker's Delight worker, Louise T18 
(in heaven since July 1990), Jono (14), Jesse (11), Jimmy & Pippa angel 
dogs, Millie (our faithful girl) and wife to David my soulmate & best friend 
for 26 years now!!! :O))

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