[tri-wings] AngelS Love

Ok, I know I'm new and I've been lurking.  I apologize for not sharing as much 
but I've kept busy.  I have really been feeling the loss of Angel since the 
days are exactly the same this year as when she was born.  She was born on a 
Saturday, Christmas Eve was a Wednesday, and that was the day I came home from 
the hospital without my little Christmas Angel and the day I found out she 
would join them.  Christmas is especially hard for me this year.  She would 
have been 5 Saturday, her older sister Samantha would have been fighting with 
her over Barbies and such, her younger brother Josh would have been there with 
hugs for them both as he is a loving boy (but make no mistake, loving and wimp 
are not to be confused in my son) and all would have been on me trying to feel 
the new baby now five months in my womb.  The newest addition is very active 
and has no signs of trisomy so I am only a little worried.  This will be my 
last child, but in concluding my fertility I reflect on the little
 Angel that is always there in the back of my mind and the corner of my heart.  
I miss her terribly and still feel the guilt and blame as sharply today as the 
very day I was informed of her "incompatibility with life".  I feel blessed to 
have those children that live, but will always mourn the one that didn't.  
Christmas just isn't the same since she came into my life and though I try to 
keep it happy for the other children, it's hard all the same.  I hope all of 
you have a better Christmas for the love of the children both here and gone.
 
Wenona Kleser

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