[tri-med] Re: laryngomalcia/Apnea--WARNING: Religious content

Dear Barb,

I remember those dim, dark days after Keren was first born and things 
were so uncertain.  Things are still uncertain, of course, but we've 
adjusted to life and God has shown us his faithfulness so many times I 
can't even count.

I remember working through the issue of "Why do we let our children 
suffer?"  I knew on the one hand without doubt that God was in control 
and knew what he was doing.  But I had to figure out some reasoning for 
myself as well.  I won't go into great detail here--I can email you 
off-list sometime with some of my rambling thoughts if you'd like.  In 
essence, though, I guess one of the things I realized was that 
sometimes we let our kids suffer in order that they can get better and 
NOT suffer as much.  For instance, Keren had such a hard time with 
reflux and breathing and eating, so when she was five months old she 
had surgery.  This first was a jaw distraction--the doctors cut her jaw 
and slowly moved it out, giving her more room for her tongue and to 
breathe.  It was a tough thing to watch, and I know Keren was in pain 
during the recovery, but what a difference it made after the fact!  
Suddenly she could breathe!  A few months later we had a g-tube 
inserted and she had a fundoplication done to help stop her reflux.  
Painful surgery, yes, but as a result she could get the nutrients she 
needed and start to thrive.

I don't know if that's any encouragement.... I hope it is....  I know 
it probably sounds trite to say, "Everyone will suffer--it's just what 
happens," even though that is true.  It's just so much harder when we 
as parents are making a decision for our kids that may cause them 
suffering....

A Bible passage that took me through some difficult times before Keren 
was born and still now was Romans 8 (all of it!)--It reiterated to me 
how God is sovereign and looking out for our best.  Also that sometimes 
we don't know how to pray, and that's okay!  God hears our hearts and 
understands!  My life-verse is Philippians 4: 6&7, "Do not be anxious 
about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with 
thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God which 
transcends all understanding will guard your heart and your mind in 
Christ Jesus."

I'm praying for you and yours!!!

Loren (wife to Kraig, mom to Keren, T18, two years old (9/27/02), and 
new little one due 7/13/05)
Southeast Michigan
http://webpages.eng.wayne.edu/~ad6075

On Wednesday, June 22, 2005, at 11:04 AM, Barbara Farlow wrote:

>  I must admit, that
> I am a little annoyed with the Almighty right now. It almost seems that
> abortion would have been the answer, and yet that is so evil, and I am 
> so
> against it. Why should it seem that those who choose it, and their 
> babies
> suffer less?  I know that suffering isn't necessarily bad, but surely 
> not
> fora small baby. Poor Annie, her little feet are poked so often (for 
> sugar
> test) they look like pin cushions, and sometimes won't give up even a 
> drop
> ofblood.
>
> My daughter has reminded me how much we just wanted to see her alive, 
> and
> maybe get a pic of all of us together, and we should be so grateful for
> that.Sometimes when you are very tired, as I am sure you know, things 
> don't
> look very clear anymore. I guess I need to pray more. This is the time 
> when
> we feel God's presence the most right? I really don't even know what 
> to pray
> for. Life with no suffering is too much to ask.

                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
                       www.trisomyonline.org
                  Families Helping Families On-line

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