[tri-med] Re: Platitudes you hate

i know this is so true.  it is funny how you get kind of numb to how folks 
look at your kid.  to me she is just kam and i dont see the severly 
developmentally delayed non-verbal wheelchair bound kid who cant really do 
anything for herself.  that is why i am so stumped when people ask how i 
know what she wants or how we communicate with each other.  we just do now 
after 10 years together.  she knows what i want and expect and i know what 
she wants most of the time too.  i see her laugh and shake her head no no to 
her brother.  i see her playing with her toys even tho there are only a few 
she can interact with.

and that is why i am so suprised when i feel peoples pity.  as she is just 
one of my 2 daughters.  the one who has given me much less grief but 
requires much more help.
jude, mom to derek-21, kelsey-19
and kameron-10-full t18 (hanging out so i will never be an empty nester)
golden, colorado usa
http://www.judewolpert.com
http://home.comcast.net/~jfwolpert2
http://flickr.com/photos/judewolpert/

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "jwaite" <jwaite@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
To: <tri-med@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Sent: Friday, November 23, 2007 7:30 AM
Subject: [tri-med] Re: Platitudes you hate


>
> ----- Original Message ----- 
> From: "Jude Wolpert" <jfwolpert2@xxxxxxxxxxx>
>
>> 'bless you for taking such good care of her.'
>
>> like i wouldnt take care of her if she was typical?  she's still my
>> daughter!
>
> Because a lot of people wouldn't!
>
> To be blunt, You have to remember that many people think that the 
> disabled,
> ESP the severely disabled, aren't really 'people' but more a thing or
> someone who holds family pet status. So in these people's minds you are
> REALLY  going above and beyond what they think one would.
>
> And frankly, that kinda scares the crap out of me.
>
> This is also why so many people terminate pregnancies, because to them 
> this
> isn't really a person.
> And/or they know what society holds for their child and chose not to 
> subject
> them to that kind of life.
> And/or they can't deal with the whole mess for MANY varied reasons.
>
> Or why the disabled are so much more at risk for abuse, by strangers AND
> family.
>
> Or why there aren't more people screaming for more/better housing, care 
> and
> support for this disenfranchised group of the human population.
>
> Or why some educational systems doesn't work harder for these kids. (I've
> known people working in the schools who feel these kids are a drain on the
> system and not worth the time as they won't  ever learn or contribute.
> Scares and depresses me when I've heard that come from their mouths.
> Or they only do what they do (very little) because it's mandated by law).
>
> It's why many children waiting for fostering or adoption have 
> disabilities.
>
> Michelle mom to Alex (20, partial trisomy 14 mosaic) and Molly (16)
> MichiganUSA
>
>
>                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
>                       www.trisomyonline.org
>                  Families Helping Families On-line
> 

                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
                       www.trisomyonline.org
                  Families Helping Families On-line

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