[tri-med] Re: Love and marriage and disabled kids!

Hi Michelle I remember meeting you at the Chicago conference.  My daughter 
Eleora has definitely brought out sides of us that we didn't know existed 
but we are still happily married for almost 12 years and she will be 6 in 
Aug.  We have no babysitter either and our family you could say is the 
opposite of good I wrote in a while ago about how my stepmother and my dad 
don't include her in the  human race.  The adjustments we have to make are 
hard and sometimes can feel completely one sided but when I married my 
husband it was for better or worse.  He is a very good father and loves us 
he works very hard to give us a good life.  I have found a place where I can 
drop both kids of for an hour or 2 and go to dinner with my husband it is at 
the the mall and close to everything so we don't go far, but it makes  a 
world of difference We also have an aid now through CAP/C who takes some of 
the burden off us of bathing and feeding every day. I do have to say that 
when the downs occur though it seems unbearable  but 3 things have gotten me 
though a good spouse (who I stay honest with), good friends (whose shoulders 
you can cry on and sometimes bitch about your spouse) and also a good church 
(who can lift you up).  I don't think my husband or I could do it alone or 
would want to try.
Cindy Mom to Eleora PT13 PD9 and Cullen 9yrs old

--------------------------------------------------
From: "Michelle Wilson" <mewildflower1@xxxxxxxxx>
Sent: Wednesday, May 28, 2008 5:20 PM
To: <tri-med@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Subject: [tri-med] Love and marriage and disabled kids!

> I was reading Jocelyn's beautiful email about her granddaughter Tess and 
> strangely enough read this line just as I was thinking about my own 
> marriage:
>
> <<No it is not an easy road (the divorce rate is 75% in
> families with a disabled child I believe). >>
>
>
> Would anyone be willing to share any stories about their own marriages 
> with me?  One or off list is fine.  If you are still married, what made 
> you stay?  If you are divorced, what made you leave?  Are you happy with 
> these choices? I have to say that Faren has brought out the worst in Rick 
> and myself many, many times and when you don't have many 
> babsitters(practically zilch) and don't spend time together alone you tend 
> to only see this side of a person.  That makes it hard to have an actual 
> relationship together.  I will admit I've been idling at a crossroads for 
> a very, very long time.  I want to make well informed choices in my life. 
> It's hard to find the right path to take when so many other lives(spouse, 
> kids,my own) are at stake.  This must be where the whole " Can't live with 
> 'em.  Can't shoot em"  saying comes in..ha ha.
>
> Michelle Wilson, mom to Faren
>
>
>
>                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
>                       www.trisomyonline.org
>                  Families Helping Families On-line
> 
                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
                       www.trisomyonline.org
                  Families Helping Families On-line

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