[tri-med] Re: I don't even know what to name this subject line....

you did the right thing-darrell pointed out that a teacher who was innocent 
of anything would fight to clear their name-never accept "resignation"-it is 
like an admission of guilt.  i agree too.  you were right to defend devon 
and the other kids-someone had to.

pam darrell,  tyler t13^l^ and kira
elora ontario
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Penny Victor" <pvictor@xxxxxxxxxxxx>
To: <tri-family@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Cc: <tri-med@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Sent: Monday, November 29, 2004 9:00 PM
Subject: [tri-med] I don't even know what to name this subject line....


> Hello Everyone....
> Sorry for the mass mail but I wanted to give an update....um...and I'm 
> unsure how I feel about it. We've had an ongoing situation with Devon here 
> since school started this year. Some of you may remember he had a lovely 
> young woman named SaraBeth who started out the year teaching Devon's 
> class...she was very young, no prior teaching Multi kids....she had taught 
> Pre K (typical kids) and adores children....we felt that if enthusiasm had 
> anything to do with it she'd do great...although we knew there'd be a time 
> of learning for her and adjustment. Unfortunately...Sara Beth became 
> overwelmed and asked to be reassigned. I was sorry...but I respected  her 
> for recognising she couldn't handle it. She didn't feel like she could 
> effectively teach Devon or the other 4 kids.  Sooooo...then came the 
> search for a new teacher...and of course there were those 3 pesky 
> hurricanes. In the meantime he was in the care of aids with no teacher.
> OK...sooooooo Devon kept coming home with bruises and scrapes. We 
> understood that with Devon's vision and balance  that he DOES fall 
> alot....truly we did/do understand that...but we DO want to know who he 
> gets his injuries. Just a note saying Devon fell and scraped his elbow 
> today...something...anything.  Well...Devon got a new teacher...Mrs 
> Fuller. She started in between 2 of the hurricanes and like the 3rd or 4th 
> day after she started I went to an open house to meet her...it was at like 
> 6 or 7 so Joe stayed home with Devon because that's his bedtime...or at 
> the very least his crabby time right before bed. I got there...introduced 
> myself...I was the only parent to come :o( I asked her what she knew about 
> Devon...figuring I could fill her in on the blank spots....figuring she 
> had read his IEP...I was really alarmed when she chuckled and said that 
> she knew nothing about him. So I said, "well...you DO know about using 
> Thick it in all his liguids because of his aspiration proble
> m right???" She gives me a blank look...again chuckles and says "No". This 
> scared the bejeezus outta me. I show her the Thick it...the laminated 
> bright lemon yellow "Devon Do's and Don'ts" posters with detailed 
> instructions on what kinds of foods he can and cannot eat...drink...his 
> toileting needs, his limited vision...etc. Next I asked..."well where is 
> his PECS notebook...do you know what PECS are?"...her answer??? "No...I 
> don't know what a PECS notebook is...haven't seen one." OK...SO HOW HAS HE 
> BEEN ABLE TO COMMUNICATE HIS NEEDS TO YOU OR TO HIS FIRST TEACHER (who has 
> no experience with Multi kids either)???? I told Joe and myself...this was 
> not her fault...but I couldn't stop thinking that she COULD have read the 
> IEPS before she started...it was important she know about the needs of 
> each student and she knew nothing!!! AND to top it off the normal aid that 
> knew something about any of them was out her first day. OK back to the 
> injuries. He kept coming home with nasty brui
> ses and scrapes with no explanations. They never even told us about the 
> first injury....and when I would ask...his new teacher got defensive. 
> Understandable...I know...but she needed to understand our need to know at 
> least how he'd gotten hurt! Everytime I would ask (in Devon's spiral 
> notebook for notes back and forth)...the teacher's or aids' notes would 
> get a decidedly cold and defensive tone to them no matter how I tried to 
> word it carefully. Meanwhile...Devon came home with an odd large mark on 
> his arm that strongly resembled a minor burn or scald mark???? They had no 
> explanation...but when they thought further about it and discussed it 
> among themselves, they decided he could have burned it on the slide. 
> Ok...maybe. Next he came home with a wicked nasty bruise covering the 
> entirety of his kneecap...again no explanation...they have no idea how it 
> happened...according to them he did not fall??? OK...so who kicked him??? 
> Next...came a call from the nurse...Devon has falled
> backwards into a table and cracked the back of his head very hard. I'm 
> like..."he fell backwards???"....did someone maybe push him...because he 
> doesn't fall backwards...if he falls it's foward. The nurse hesitatingly 
> tells me that yes he was pushed. She said he was VERY upset...and would 
> not sit down or calm down...she said he had a knot on the back of his head 
> and he wouldn't stop crying. I tried to make myself not over 
> react...obviously a new nurse...I told her that the reason he wouldn't sit 
> down and wouldn't stop crying is more than likely because he resented 
> being taken out of his class...and being confined to the clinic...and if 
> there were snacks involved, you can bump up the upset-o-meter by 100 
> notches!!! I told her to take him back to his class room and tell them to 
> watch him VERY closely...and if he did not calm down or acted wierd in any 
> way to call me and I would come get him right away. No call came...he 
> calmed down just like I said he would...and even though I
> don't doubt for a minute he got hurt and badly...the knot she was feeling 
> was just the bone ridge on the back of his head. Still I debated taking 
> him to the ER...or the doctors...but watched him myself and he acted fine. 
> On Nov 11 he came home from school and I went to put a fresh pullup on 
> him...I was very upset to find a wicked nasty bruise in the shape of a 
> hand print...fingers only...but you could clearly see the digits of the 
> fingers...as if he'd been grabbed VERY HARD and PINCHED!!! I asked...and 
> again...they have no idea how it happened "they are aware of no 
> incidents". OKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY...so we're REALLY 
> starting to get mad...and meanwhile...since this school year has 
> started...Devon has started continually whining...almost like he thinks 
> this is the only way he can get what he wants/needs...he has also started 
> bawling like a baby with heart breaking tears when I put his jacket and 
> harness on to catch the bus. This is something that has always brou
> ght him great amounts of joy...tigger bouncing, giggling, and extreme glee 
> and excitement...not anymore...most days he's crying when I put him on the 
> bus. Needless to say Joe and I have been worried sick about him all day 
> every day :o(
> I kept trying to tell myself I was over reacting...being ridiculous...I 
> didn't want to get a reputation of being a trouble maker...so I kept 
> trying to handle it without going over the teacher's head. I was also 
> afraid that if I did make a formal complaint that it would be our word 
> against theirs and I was afraid they would either treat him bad or 
> worse...or maybe even call children's services in an effort to beat us to 
> the punch if they were afraid we might call them ourselves. If someone 
> came and took Devon out of school or out if our home it would destroy me 
> and Joe...and Nick...and who knows what would happen to Devon??? BUT...a 
> week ago last Friday came the last straw. I went to get Devon off the bus 
> and his aid told me he had wet himself. And I'm thinking to myself...how 
> do you know...he's wearing a pullup??? I look at Devon's shorts and sure 
> enough...he's soaked...looked like he'd been sitting in a saddle all day 
> and the whole crotch and inner legs were soaked??? OK....
> so now I'm really puzzled...I've never known his pullups to leak in that 
> manner??? I got him in the house and told him to get up on the couch so I 
> could change him and I pulled down his shorts...imagine my surprise when 
> "THERE'S PETEY!!!" He wasn't wearing a pullup!!! Now please tell me...how 
> does one FORGET to put a pull up on a little boy whom you've just taken 
> one off of???? Ran out of pull ups you may suggest??? NO...I had just sent 
> them and they were clearly marked as his. Even if we had run out of 
> pullups...there are others there...Lord knows Devon's have been used for 
> other children!!! Heck I donated like 6 cases to them during the storms 
> because his school was used as a shelter. True...the ones I donated were a 
> little snug...but they still could be used in a pinch.
> I called Mrs Taylor...the principal...I told her everything that had been 
> going on. I told her how the notes implied new aids everyday was the 
> problem...Mrs Taylor told me today that the aids have not been changing 
> daily as was told to me by Mrs Fuller. She was always blaming an aid...but 
> she always had to "see who was on that day". I also haven't got the first 
> accident report...HECK! I don't even have his first report card and it's 
> over halfway to the second one!!!!! On Sunday...I sat and wrote a long 
> letter and told her we were basically done being quiet and trying to 
> handle this without ruffling feathers...I also emailed her pictures...as 
> I've been taking pictures and recording dates of injuries and the nature 
> of each one. Today she called me as soon as I got home. Keep in mind when 
> I put Devon's jacket on him and harness this morning he bawled like a 
> baby...he was still bawling and crying big real tears when I helped fasten 
> him into his seat....when the bus pulled away th
> is morning I was bawling too :o( Mrs Taylor told me she was 
> worried/troubled after my phone call...forgetting to put the pull up on 
> also really bothered her also...and the pictures REALLY bothered her. She 
> had already made the decision to talk to Mrs Fuller today...but my letter 
> put her over the top...and by the way...Dana...Devon's med waiver support 
> coordinator has been kept abreast of these things and she told me to write 
> to her so that our concerns would be documented. She said she thought 
> maybe we have a negligence/abuse case...neglect at the very least. 
> Well....Mrs Taylor told me that something IS being done!!! She said that 
> she went and spoke to Mrs Fuller today and that she is resigning and her 
> last day will be Thursday. She also said she took the letter and pictures 
> to the next level up...district...and showed them and asked how she should 
> proceed. They advised her to call and make a sheriff's report so that in 
> case anything else happened it would be documented...th
> is is what Dana was aiming for having done as well. She wanted me to know 
> in case the sheriff's dept calls ar comes to talk to us...she didn't want 
> us to freak out. She said that she will be asking Audrey to take Devon and 
> his 3 classmates for the remaining 2 weeks before vacation and that she is 
> interviewing a teacher and aid (I had the impression it was a package 
> deal???)...she would not tell me who it was and kind of implied I may know 
> who it is...but I have no idea who it is...though I wish it was Kris :o)
> Sooooooooo...this is what's been going on around here....I have a headache 
> the size of this planet...but I feel better having reported it and even 
> though I really didn't picture anyone resigning....I have no idea if it 
> was voluntary or if she was asked to???...but I feel a little better about 
> Devon's well being. I'll keep ya all posted....
> Love,
> Penny...loving and devoted wife to Joe, the best husband in the 
> world...mom to Nick (14 yrs old...lover of Dragons, Turtles, Yu Gi Oh, 
> RollerCoasters, Chocolate Icecream with Ovaltine sprinkles, Devon (9 
> yrs...lover of Barney, Blue, Bear in the Big Blue House, Elmo, Stuart 
> Little, Teletubbies and food in general...Full trisomy 13 w/balanced 
> translocation 5 and 13) , and Trooper the Wonder Dog...our 6 or 7 year old 
> male yellow lab adopted from FL Lab Rescue 12/13/02 :o)
> Please visit the webpage my wonderful friend Karen made for me on our 
> trisomy listserv at...
> http://www.trisomyonline.org/victor.htm
> AND...Devon's moment of glory in Exceptional Parent Magazine...
> http://www.eparent.com/familiarfaces/ffaces_4_01.htm
> AND...see our 3 handsome boys on FL Lab Rescue's website at:
> http://www.labradorrescue.net/success/index.html
>                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
>                       www.trisomyonline.org
>                  Families Helping Families On-line
> 


                  Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
                       www.trisomyonline.org
                  Families Helping Families On-line

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