[tri-med] Re: Do tri 13/18 kids experience joy?
- From: Barbara Farlow <b_farlow@xxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: <tri-med@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 16:59:04 +0000
Thanks for sharing that story Wendi.
You really should consider going back to those doctors. It sounds like your ob
is compassionate. I wonder if he/she might open the door or show you the door
of somewhere that you can share your experience with perinatologists and
genetics people? Maybe there is a college nearby? I have had the opportunity to
speak to med students via the genetics classes. It is the best opportunity of
all.
barb
> Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 09:46:06 -0700
> From: wendijo24@xxxxxxxxx
> Subject: [tri-med] Re: Do tri 13/18 kids experience joy?
> To: tri-med@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
>
> These stories always make me so sad. I haven't shared this story before, but
> when I was 22 weeks pregnant with Jameson, the Level II u/s showed a choroid
> plexus cyst. The perinatologist came in and said that based on my age (38)
> and having another child with a trisomy, he felt that this baby had trisomy
> 18 and we should consider terminiation. This is with no other testing done.
> I was horrified that he would go right there without any other confirming
> tests.
>
> I insisted on bloodwork before we made any decisions about anything and went
> to have a Quad Screen done. I was a mess. The woman behind the counter at
> the Lab looked at my orders and said, "Does this mean what I think it means?"
> I asked her what she thought it meant. She said, "That you're having
> Quads!" I started crying so hard I couldn't speak.
>
> Long story short, bloodwork came back fine, the cyst was gone at the next u/s
> and Jameson is now a healthy 7 month old. And, no apology from the
> perinatologist. My OB felt horrible and said he wished he would've known
> what happened because often times the cysts resolve themselves with no other
> issues.
>
> I'm just always so shocked that so many doctors don't give these babies a
> second thought and think that they are disposable.
>
> We were told Jackson would never walk, talk, learn and have a myriad of
> health issues. He was 5 weeks old at the time, we didn't know about his dx
> before birth. He's definately behind his peers, but he's labelling colors,
> numbers and letters, has a huge vocabulary, and loves playing with other
> kids. He has an awesome sense of humor and is a loving, affection little
> man. I so want to go back to those drs and tell them they have no clue.
>
>
> Wendi, mom to Jackson, trisomy 4p, inverted duplication, 4 years and Jameson,
> 7 months
>
>
>
> --- On Wed, 8/27/08, Barbara Farlow <b_farlow@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
>
> From: Barbara Farlow <b_farlow@xxxxxxxxxxx>
> Subject: [tri-med] Re: FayeRe: Do tri 13/18 kids experience joy?
> To: tri-med@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
> Date: Wednesday, August 27, 2008, 11:13 AM
>
> HI Faye,
> I agree, but that is the problem. This is a seasoned and experienced
> neonatologist who has been directing parents on choices to make for decades.
>
> One of the administrators at the hospital that we had our troubles at told us
> that in one internal meeting pertaining to our situation, one of our
> daughter's physicians, asked, "But who would want a child like that
> anyways?" Now I understand why.
>
> Our very aggressive government-run genetic screening/testing/termination
> network uses teaching materials for physicians that show a severely afflicted
> (likely stillborn) infant with trisomy 13 alongside a picture of a cyclops as
> if
> to make the comparison of two monsters side by side. (I am happy to forward
> the
> picture to anyone upon request)
>
> Those who stand to profit by a reduction in medical costs that are realized by
> the elimination of some kinds of kids, encourage the belief that genetic kids
> are like non-sentient monsters with no worth whatsoever.
>
> So, how do we make the truth be known?
>
> Barb
>
>
>
> > Subject: [tri-med] Re: Do tri 13/18 kids experience joy?
> > Date: Wed, 27 Aug 2008 10:13:11 -0500
> > From: fkaufman@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
> > To: tri-med@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
> >
> > The doctor obviously spoke with out first hand knowledge!
> >
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: tri-med-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx [mailto:tri-med-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx]
> > On Behalf Of Barbara Farlow
> > Sent: 08/26/2008 8:10 PM
> > To: tri med lists; triwings
> > Subject: [tri-med] Do tri 13/18 kids experience joy?
> >
> > Hello friends in trisomy,
> > In communication recently with an experienced neonatologist, I was quite
> > surprised to read that he believed that children with tri 13/18 were not
> > worth saving because they were "not sentient", which means that
> they are
> > not capable of experiencing joy or interacting with their surroundings.
> >
> > Wow. This is certainly not what I saw when I did research before my
> > daughter was born. Sure, it is a tough road, with a lot of sacrifice.
> > But as for not experiencing joy....
> >
> > I sent him some videos; a child with tri 13 and mieko videos (I made
> > special mention of the one aptly named, "giggles")
> > I seriously wonder if loving parents see something as clear as day that
> > physicians and the medical system are blind to.
> >
> > Does anyone have any comments about this?
> >
> > By the way, the ironman just finished his 11th race to increase
> > awareness. He is getting more and more press each time. It is pretty
> > exciting.
> >
> > www.ironmanforkids.com
> >
> > Barb (mom to Annie)
> >
> > _________________________________________________________________
> >
> >
> > Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
> > www.trisomyonline.org
> > Families Helping Families On-line
> >
> >
> >
> > Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
> > www.trisomyonline.org
> > Families Helping Families On-line
> >
>
> _________________________________________________________________
>
>
> Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
> www.trisomyonline.org
> Families Helping Families On-line
>
>
> Building ___ooOOoo__ Rainbows
> www.trisomyonline.org
> Families Helping Families On-line
>
_________________________________________________________________
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- [tri-med] Re: FayeRe: Do tri 13/18 kids experience joy?
- From: Barbara Farlow
- [tri-med] Re: Do tri 13/18 kids experience joy?
- From: Wendi
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- [tri-med] Re: FayeRe: Do tri 13/18 kids experience joy?
- From: Barbara Farlow
- [tri-med] Re: Do tri 13/18 kids experience joy?
- From: Wendi