* We're back. This week we feature a fake newsletter from a variety store manager to his employees. Sit back and take a look. Korner Variety Monthly Newsletter By Neil Pasricha Volume III, Issue VII Finely compiled, edited, printed, and distributed by Paul Shemp, Korner Variety Manager Greetings Korner Variety part-time and full-time employees and welcome to the 31st issue of the Korner Variety Monthly Newsletter. As always, this edition comes to you hot off our self-serve photocopier by the freezer and folded into your pay check envelope with a Scratch 'N' Score ticket. And now, the news! Magazine Sign Upgrade Our current magazine rack sign is in desperate need of repair. The current "Buy don't read the magazines. Not the library!" sign has grown sun-soaked to the point where the black lettering has faded into an embarrassing dull brown. Also, the corners are dog-eared, the Scotch tape holding the sign to the TV Guide rack is slipping, and someone has written "you're magazines suck!!!" on the sign in red pen. For our new sign I was thinking that we could go with "Do you see shelves of books and librarians here? No? That's because this isn't a library so please purchase your magazine before reading it!" I thought this new "added- detail" message might hit home with more people. Andrew, please make this sign on your new computer before you head off to college. I've left a CD of clipart labeled "Paul's Personal Pics" for you under the counter and I recommend using the one of that duck in a business suit swinging the ball peen hammer at his computer. Please have the proofs ready for my approval by close of business Sunday. For the full article please visit: http://www.thebigjewel.com/kornervariety/ --- To subscribe/unsubscribe from this list please send us an email with your request, as well as a bulleted list the first 200 prime numbers.