[thebigjewel] Cinematic Emergency Procedures - April 2, 2008

  • From: "The Big Jewel" <list@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: <thebigjewel@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Wed, 2 Apr 2008 19:55:13 -0600 (MDT)

Here at The Big Jewel we know what to do in an emergency. Fortunately
we're not fictional characters in a movie, or we'd always be encountering
certain kinds of emergencies unique to Hollywood. Then again, thanks to
the foresight of David Jaggard, we'd know what to do in those situations,

Cinematic Emergency Procedures

By David Jaggard

If you are a main character in a motion picture, please read and memorize
these safety instructions. They could save your life. Not to mention your
gross box office.

It is a widely-known fact that most emergencies occur in the well-located,
trendily decorated and perpetually tidy home that you can somehow afford
no matter what job you have, even if you are a policeman, waitress,
struggling actor or unemployed. Research has shown that by far the most
common type of emergency for people in your socioeconomic group is
someone, or, of course, someTHING, trying to kill you. Should you find
yourself in this situation, proceed as follows...

For the full article please visit http://www.thebigjewel.com

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