Welcome to The Big Jewel, which, if read aloud, is guaranteed to put babies to sleep. Speaking of creatures who scream like banshees and need to have their diapers changed every few minutes, you may think the lives of the great composers are filled with nothing but debauchery and luxury. Debauchery, yes. Luxury, no. These geniuses were by and large tortured souls. As Bonzo Dog Band member Neil Innes once put it, "I suffered for my art; now it's your turn." Never have we seen this proposition illustrated more clearly than in Tyler Smith's piece for us this week: Brahms' Other Lullabies By Tyler Smith Lullaby in D-flat major Begun in the dulcet triple meter of his most renowned berceuse (the Wiegenlied, opus 94, #4), this misbegotten piece by Brahms veers astray when he eschews the conservative chromaticism of the traditional lullaby and opts for a more aggressive atonal approach. Eighth notes cluster in the upper registers, dissonantly burping out in random ostinato sprays, as Brahms, at wit's end, tries to soothe "Big" Bertha Faber's illegitimate infant while she goes out to settle a score with her pimp... For the full article please visit http://www.thebigjewel.com To unsubscribe from The Big Jewel's Hilarious Weekly Email please send an email with the word UNSUBSCRIBE in the subject line to neilpasricha@xxxxxxxxx