[tcb] Re: that wierd noise
- From: "Gerald V. Livingston II" <gvl2@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: tcb@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Fri, 21 Jul 2006 16:05:01 -0500 (Central Standard Time)
Cheeseburgers blow all the calculations right out the window. EVERYONE
knows that a 1/4 lb cheeseburger converts to roughly 6.37 extra lbs of A$$
fat on a sliding logarythmic scale over a 1.42 hour period.
Most of that weight gain occurs in sudden increments every 17.287 minutes.
This requires the use of a stopwatch accurate to .0001 second because if
you are on the cheater pipe during one of those growth spurts you risk a
serious case of "cheater face". Cheater face occurs when weight is suddenly
added to the cheater pipe when you aren't expecting it -- this causes your
hands to slip off the pipe and, like the tree branches you see in funny
films, it springs up and catches you right in the kisser.
You have to carefully time the growth spurts and move .2734" closer to the
nut each time one happens. If you miss one you can not "double up" next
time around. You have to start all over by waiting the full 1.42 hours,
reweighing, then eating another cheesburger.
And, cheesburger math is relatively easy. Don't EVER screw up and eat a
Sonic Extra Long Chili-Cheese Dog while trying to torque nuts with a
cheater pipe and body weight.
On Fri, 21 Jul 2006 16:29:36 EDT "Wuzmop@xxxxxxx" <Wuzmop@xxxxxxx> wrote:
> What if you had a cheeseburger before tightening the nut?
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