[ratpack] HUMOR: NEW Stimulus Check

Still laughing...  
How about if I get the tatoo and have a yard sale while I drink beer all day 
with a ball player??   
 

I called the Canon tech to figure out why my printer wasn't printing correctly 
from Photoshop (JUST photoshop - not Illustrator, Preview or Word).  btw - 
Photoshop printed fine to the big Epson printer, just not the Canon, and I had 
already reinstalled Photoshop from Disk.

I got to talk to a guy in Virginia who spoke perfect English.  He actually KNEW 
his business and had me back up and running within 20-30 minutes.  (Print 
driver update was no good, go back to disk copy and reinstall.)  Yeah, it was a 
no-brainer, but he'd never seen one just print badly from one program.  It was 
a bit weird.

anyway - 
I'll buy Canon again just for that call.  I HATED calling HP support.  If I 
could even understand the tech they had no clue how to handle the problem and I 
spent hours on the phone unnecessarily for a cheap printer.  

also, my sinus operation was a success, and I'm headed out to the track this 
weekend and next weekend, at least for a few hours each day.  I'm finishing up 
a big painting of Shane Turpin in a race from last year and it looks pretty 
good.  
Sorry, guys, but I'm enjoying the negative/positive space in motorcycles, and 
they're the only races out here, anyway.

I almost cried when I watched the Rolex race the other day.  

 Aleta



On May 16, 2012, at 11:54 PM, humminboid@xxxxxxxxxxx wrote:

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> Sometime this year,  we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic  
> Stimulus' payment. 
> 
> This is indeed a very exciting program,  and I'll explain it by using a Q & A 
> format: 
> 
> 
> Q.  What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ? 
> 
> A.  It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers. 
> 
> 
> Q..  Where will the government get this money ? 
> 
> A.  From taxpayers. 
> 
> 
> Q.  So the government is giving me back my own money ? 
> 
> A.  Only a smidgen of it. 
> 
> 
> Q.  What is the purpose of this payment ? 
> 
> A.  The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a  high-definition TV 
> set,  thus stimulating the economy. 
> 
> 
> Q.  But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ? 
> 
> A.  Shut up. 
> 
> 
> Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. Economy by  
> spending your stimulus check wisely:       
> 
> 
>         
> 
>      *  If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart,  the money will go to 
> China or Sri Lanka . 
> 
> 
>      *  If you spend it on gasoline,  your money will go to the  Arabs. 
> 
> 
>      *  If you purchase a computer,  it will go to India , Taiwan or  China . 
> 
>     
> 
>      *  If you purchase fruit and vegetables,  it will go to Mexico , 
> Honduras and Guatemala .. 
> 
>     
> 
>      *  If you buy an efficient  car,  it will go to Japan or Korea . 
> 
> 
>   
> 
>      *  If  you purchase useless stuff,  it will go to Taiwan . 
> 
>   
> 
>      *  If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock,  it will go  to 
> management bonuses and they will hide it offshore. 
> 
> 
> Instead,  keep the money in America by: 
> 
> 
> 1)  Spending it at yard sales,  or    
> 
> 2)  Going to ball games,  or   
> 
> 3)  Spending it on prostitutes,  or     
> 
> 4)  Beer or     
> 
> 5) Tattoos. 
> 
> 
> (These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. ) 
> 
> Conclusion: 
> 
> Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and 
> drink beer all day ! 
> 
> 
> No need to thank me,  I'm just glad I could be of help.
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