[pr0k] Re: A Pr0k Concept Album
- From: "Steven Pick" <steve.pick@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: <pr0k@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Thu, 4 Jul 2002 14:30:30 +0100
>
> To make it easier...
>
> chapter #1 - Done
>
> #2 - about running away from home
> #3 - about being in a big city
> #4 - about trying to be cool (think "Jason" trying to be "toks"
> (hahahahahaha))
> #4 - about smoking a cigarette
> #5 - about getting a prostitute
> #6 - about getting a prostitute to piss on him
> #7 - about drinking beer
> #8 - about getting in a drunken brawl
> #9 - about being in prison
> #10 - about getting rammed in prison
> #11 - about being a bum on the streets, but happy to be a mormon again
>
>
>
Secret Track #12 - Mormon Masturbation
God, you gave me two hands
But this I cannot understand
You give me a handle-shaped salami
Which fits so nicely, but drives me barmy
The urges are getting too great
I feel the need to masturbate
But when I do, I think about God
He will show me the waaaaaaaay
"Don't think about breasts, or lesbian incest"
"Don't think about muff, getting women up the duff"
"Just think about the rainbow of respecting yourself!"
...and God's on the other side waving me on....
I have to be careful about my sexual flaws
Unfortunately my testes are giant beach balls
I need to relieve myself somehow, someway
A woman's open mouth or a cow's passageway
I think about slapping a bitch in the bath
And filling her emptiness with my mighty staff
But when I think of these things I do tell
God and he warns me that I'll burn in hell
"Don't think about orgies, or three-in-a-bed romps"
"Don't think about blowjobs or slapping red rump"
"Just think about the rainbow of sexless thoughts!"
...and God will let me into his holy kingdom...
*choir*
"God hates a waaaaankker"
"God loves chaaasssity"
"God wants you to lock up your balls"
"God neeeeeeeeeeeeeddsss yoooouuuuuuuu"
*rawk voice*
IN HIS SEXLESS AAARMY... OOOWW! IN HIS SEXLESS AAARMMY... OOOWW!!!
*in background, gospel choir*
JOOOOIN USS, JOOOOIN UUSS
CUT OFF YOUR HANDS AND SELL THEM TO TRAMPS!
JOOOOIN USS, JOOOOIN UUSS
GOUGE OUT YOUR EYES AND SELL THEM TO TRAMPS!
JOOOOIN USS, JOOOOIN UUSS
RIP OUT YOUR SCROTUM AND SELL IT TO TRAMPS!
JOOOOIN USS, JOOOOIN UUSS
AAAND TRRAAAMPPS WILL BE OUR NEEW PIIIIIMPPPPPSSSSSSS!
"What have I done? What have I done? Why, God, why?"
*god's voice*
"I HATE YOU, SEXLESS MORTAL. DIE!!!!"
"Nooo!OoooOoOOOoooOOOoooOOoooOooooo!"
(all through the song is a thinly-veiled Swedish porn soundtrack)
Steve ;)~
Art Monkey
steve.pick@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
"I'm not sure what I am supposed
to taste besides pain"
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