RE: standards
- From: "Ellis R. Miller" <sartre1@xxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: <oracle-l@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Wed, 4 Aug 2004 22:03:28 -0600
In my seven short years as an IT professional the only employees I have ever
seen fired were the ones who actually tried to develop and implement sane
standards, for example. Other terminations similarly tied to any vain
exhibition of sheer competence or "not being nice." (An example of "not
being nice" might be any one of the responses to the original question
regarding standards).
Arizona Public Service has 553 FTE's and not one has ever been fired for
incompetence yet at least 250 are legally blind, deaf, brain dead, or
otherwise collecting corporate welfare. Yet, they have burned through at
least several dozen IT contractors in the past three years. There are those
at APS who surely cannot read and write at the 8th grade level yet are being
paid $70K as Sr. Network Engineers yet couldn't reverse engineer my home
LAN.
HDS McKesson has one Steve Wang, who telecommutes up to three days a week (I
am a huge fan of legitimate telecommuting) yet is never in the office. Ever.
Unfortunately, his IT Manager is incapable of calculating the second
derivative. Thus, she cannot ascertain which three days Steve works from
home. Nevertheless, it is a blessing when he is not in the office as he is
singularly noteworthy...being one of the more inept, unhygienic Oracle DBA's
in the Valley.
Ken Stockton, formerly of Cyclone Commerce, is currently an Oracle DBA for
DHL. DHL hired him as a personal favor to the CTO of Cyclone, David Bennett.
Ken's father was surely in the mafia or saved someone's life in the war as
Mr. Stockton is too stupid, lazy, and inept to even work at APS. First, he
will yell at you when he does not understand an Oracle 6 or above concept
then, assuming you ever stoop so low as to defend yourself, you will be
terminated. Have to keep the slow, lazy ones happy at all costs and
occasionally bring in the outside help to ensure he keeps his job.
Finally, Jason Santos, a UNIX Administrator I do not know, personally, was
terminated from APS less than two months ago. A former acquaintance, Brent
Killion, "had to fire him" because Jason wouldn't arrive at 8am and leave at
5pm (liked to arrive around 9am and work until whenever). And, as Brent so
aptly pointed out, "it is okay to do nothing at APS but you have to get here
on time and at least attend your meetings." Jason was only billing 40 hours
a week and according to Brent was doing an incredible job for the first 8
months or until he was no longer of any use: once an IT project is completed
by an outside contractor merely slip on one adverb/adjective and the ax will
come down. Just ask Jason Santos, Scott Souza, etc.
By the way, I list the names of the people and places as a warning to anyone
considering or already comprising the ranks of Phoenix IT: leave, now,
before they sell you a refurbished Indian casino or some development
property. The old schoolers love their kind and will see the heavens fall or
that APS Peoplesoft budget of $20 million burn before they terminate a lazy,
inept moron. At the very least, never drive within even a few miles of APS.
Aside from the dangerous levels of radiation the damage to your mental
health is irreparable.
In contrast, as a Financial Analyst (first five years of my career), I have
personally witnessed at least eight employees terminated for blinding
stupidity, laziness, and/or utter incompetence and as a Manager even
terminated two myself. (Unfortunately, Fastow wasn't included in the list).
If anyone has ever seen, heard, or witnessed an IT professional being
terminated for incompetence within the ranks of a Fortune 500 IT department
I would cherish the anecdote forever. In my humble opinion, those old
schoolers (at least the ones who comprise Phoenix IT) are playing a rigged
game. Guys/girls like those on this list do all the work and Orville and
Wilbur Wright, in one fashion or another, just keep rolling on making
certain not a non-obese soul outside the inner-circle of doughnut worshipers
hears anything about who did the real work. In short, in seven years I have
yet to witness/read about/or even hear of a termination due to incompetence
within the ranks of IT. It has been my experience that those who find a home
for twenty years, do nothing, and "go along to get along" are forever
protected until those plastic hips finally give out...and I pray to god it
is tomorrow morning when the Mayo clinic announces they have no more baboon
hearts.
Ellis
-----Original Message-----
From: oracle-l-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:oracle-l-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx]On Behalf Of TOMPKINS, MARGARET
Sent: Wednesday, August 04, 2004 7:46 PM
To: oracle-l@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: RE: standards
I personally prefer firing before flogging, but flogging first does set =
a better example.....
Respectfully,
> Maggie Tompkins - CAD SQA
> Corporate Applications Division
> Technology Services Organization - Kansas City
> Defense Finance and Accounting Service
> 816-926-1117 (DSN 465); Margaret.Tompkins@xxxxxxxx
-----Original Message-----
From: oracle-l-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:oracle-l-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx]On Behalf Of david wendelken
Sent: Wednesday, August 04, 2004 6:37 PM
To: oracle-l@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: Re: standards
How about:
PL/SQL Programmers who use exception blocks like this will be flogged, =
then fired from their job.
EXCEPTION
WHEN OTHERS THEN
NULL;
END;
:)
-----Original Message-----
From: David <thump@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Sent: Aug 4, 2004 3:45 PM
To: oracle-l@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: standards
I ahve been asked to write the standards for the company in terms of
Oracle databases.
I have never done anythign like that before...
Anyone have any pointers or skeletons or examples I could review?
Cheers
--=20
..
David
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