**Via my wife: TC, /Steve Cameron, NJ > This individual seeks an executive-level > position. > > > He will be available next January 2004, and is > willing to relocate, preferably within the US only. > > > > RESUME > > GEORGE W. BUSH > 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue > Washington, DC 20520 > > > EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE > > Law Enforcement: > - I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in > 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. > - I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my > driver's license suspended for 30 days. > - My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is > not available. > > Military: > - I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went > AWOL. > - I refused to take a drug test or answer any > questions about my drug use. > - By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was > able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam. > > College: > - I graduated from Yale University with a low C > average. > - I was a cheerleader! > > PAST WORK EXPERIENCE > > - I ran for US Congress and lost. > - I began my career in the oil business in > Midland, Texas, in 1975. > - I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any > oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my > stock. > - I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a > sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money. > - With the help of my father and our friends in > the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor > of Texas. > > ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS > > - I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power > and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the Union. > During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden > city in America. > - I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury > to the tune of billions in borrowed money. > - I set the record for the most executions by > any governor in American history. > - With the help of my brother, the governor of > Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became > President after losing by over 500,000 votes. > > ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT > > - I am the first President in US history to > enter office with a criminal record. > - I invaded and occupied two countries at a > continuing cost of over one billion dollars per week. > - I spent the US surplus and effectively > bankrupted the US Treasury. > - I shattered the record for the largest annual > deficit in US history. > - I set an economic record for most private > bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period. > - I set the all-time record for most > foreclosures in a 12-month period. > - I set the all-time record for the biggest drop > in the history of the US stock market. > - In my first year in office, over 2 million > Americans lost their jobs and that trend continues every month. > - I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are > the richest of any administration in US history. My "poorest > millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her. > > - I set the record for most campaign fundraising > trips by a US President. > - I am the all-time US and world record-holder > for receiving the most corporate campaign donations. > - My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and > one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate > bankruptcy fraud in US History, Enron. > - My political party used Enron private jets and > corporate attorneys to assure my success with the US Supreme Court > during my election decision. > - I have protected my friends at Enron and > Halliburton against investigation or prosecution. More time and money > was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent > investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history. > - I presided over the biggest energy crisis in > US history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil > industry was revealed. > - I presided over the highest gasoline prices in > US history. > - I changed the US policy to allow convicted > criminals to be awarded government contracts. > - I appointed more convicted criminals to > administration than any President in US history. > - I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, > the largest bureaucracy in the history of the United States government. > - I've broken more international treaties than > any President in US history. > - I am the first President in US history to have > the United Nations remove the US from the Human Rights Commission. > - I withdrew the US from the World Court of Law. > > - I refused to allow inspector's access to US > "prisoners of war" detainees and thereby have refused to abide by the > Geneva Convention. > - I am the first President in history to refuse > United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 US election). > - I set the record for fewest numbers of press > conferences of any President since the advent of television. > - I set the all-time record for most days on > vacation in any one-year period. > - After taking off the entire month of August, I > presided over the worst security failure in US history. > - I garnered the most sympathy ever for the US > after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the > US the most hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy > in world history. > - I have set the all-time record for most people > worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million > people), shattering the record for protests against any person in the > history of mankind. > - I am the first President in US history to > order an unprovoked, preemptive attack and the military occupation of a > sovereign nation. I did so against the will of the United Nations, the > majority of US citizens, and the world community. > - I have cut health care benefits for war > veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and > their families in wartime. > - In my State of the Union Address, I lied about > our reasons for attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on our British > friends. > - I am the first President in history to have a > majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to > world peace and security. > - I am supporting development of a nuclear > "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD. > - I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to > bring Osama Bin Laden to justice. > > RECORDS AND REFERENCES > > - All records of my tenure as governor of Texas > are now in my father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view. > - All records of SEC investigations into my > insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and > unavailable for public view. > - All records or minutes from meetings that I, > or my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed > in secrecy and unavailable for public review. Paul Stone wrote: > It seems that there is a group (CSE Citizens for a Sound Economy) of > Republicans who, instead of campaigning for Bush are actually campaigning > for Ralph Nader in an effort to draw votes away from John Kerry. Oh, those > crazy guys! > > p > > ########## > Paul Stone > pas@xxxxxxxx > Kingsville, ON, Canada > > ------------------------------------------------------------------ > To change your Lit-Ideas settings (subscribe/unsub, vacation on/off, > digest on/off), visit www.andreas.com/faq-lit-ideas.html > ------------------------------------------------------------------ To change your Lit-Ideas settings (subscribe/unsub, vacation on/off, digest on/off), visit www.andreas.com/faq-lit-ideas.html