----- Original Message ----- From: To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx Sent: 12/30/2005 11:39:37 AM Subject: [lit-ideas] Re: New Year's Resolutions In a message dated 12/30/2005 10:29:58 A.M. Central Standard Time, aamago@xxxxxxxxxxxxx writes: You're going to write about yourself and I'll write about myself. Hi, No...when you whine and complain about humanity or about yourself--I WILL respond. Irene: Obviously you feel obligated. What can I say. Be advised that I only look at your stuff, I don't read it. There's just too much. In the end, no matter what we write about whom, like any author, we're writing about ourselves anyway. What you're writing about me is coming out of you, so it's by definition about you. It's a listserv, not a blog. When people post ideas, comments, thoughts--I thought the whole point of a listserv was to discuss those items. Irene: And/or get nasty notes instead. What was it you thought I was in, a book burning group or something like that? If I am mistaken, perhaps some of our more aware and internet-savvy people could redefine the definition for me, please! If you want to whine and complain and not get a response (but still want to be publicly doing so), I suggest you get a blog. There are lots of people on this list who have blogs and, I'm sure, they would be willing to suggest to you where you can go to set one up. Irene: You're suggesting people not post to the list but instead go to blogs? Do you not like the list? Marlen: Otherwise, if you want to share thoughts (negative or positive), then I will share my responses to those. Irene: There's sharing and then there's writing pages and pages about your prescriptions for living for me. Share away. And, if you would like to discuss whether or not a child has two parents no matter where that child lives--that is fine with me! I'm often in discussion about such things as I am very very involved with groups which advocate for more contact for non-custodial parents, the concept of 50/50 visitation/custody resolutions, those who deal with PAS (parental alienation syndrome), merits of marriage versus living together either before or after marriage [the trend is for more people to NOT get married...so sure, a discussion of whether or not marriage is passe and why would be very interesting to me...Especially would be interesting as you don't have kids and one reason many people state for marriage is that a kid needs 'two parents' as though that does not happen unless marriage occurs. But, if one gets married and has no kids--why? why not? Could be very interesting as the societal reason most often given is solely in regard to children...] But, I am extremely involved with g roups who find merit in all sorts of families--I have friends (and know of many others) who are gay and married to the partner--sometimes with children from a former heterosexual marriage. That means, basically, that the child often has THREE parents (maybe even FOUR) with lots of love from a very extended family happening... and there are studies being done on those families, too! Irene: There are potentially some issues in the above. I tell you what. Instead of speaking in general terms, why don't I write pages and pages on what you are doing with your kid and what you are thinking about your kid and what you want to do with your kid and what you should be doing with your kid. So--if others would weigh in on whether or not I can respond to Andy/Irene, I would appreciate it! Irene: You have all the answers for me, yet you solicit help for your own life. Isn't it always the way. Irene I may very well have a mistaken idea of what a listserv has as its function and purpose... Best, Marlena in Missouri Yes, happy new year! .