[lit-ideas] LARRY CRAIG IS NOT A HOMOSEXUAL!!!!!

I am so glad that Senator Larry Craig has denied that he is gay -- not that 
there's anything wrong with that --  but these Republicans are taking all the 
fun out of attacking them, it's like shooting fish in a barrel.  We need a 
worth opponent.  I pray Larry Craig doesn't fall on his knees asking for 
forgiveness like Clinton did.  I hope he fights these accusations tooth and 
nail.  I hope he gets on Larry King Live and asks Larry King to expose himself 
and Larry King does, and Larry Craig shakes his sad head and says:  "Nope, not 
one bit interested.  Not in the least."  Lord knows, we Liberals are tired of 
attacking hypocritical righteousness of all the sleaze-bags like ourselves.   
Give us back our fun!  Please, God, let there be a true Family Values male 
politician out there somewhere who knows his children's names even while 
staring at another guy's thighs, give us one just Republican politician whose 
focus on the family is so above board that no hooker's line can sink. 
 
God has been good to Democrats of late, apparently He's left the building.  
Even God has become thoroughly disillusioned with Bush and wants him out.  But 
Liberals take warning.  Though the New Theocracy hasn't panned out like He 
envisioned, that doesn't mean there's an end to it.  The guys God chose to lead 
the campaign weren't even able subdue a bunch of 7th Century nomads with 
camels.  What's with that?  Christ Almighty!  And God gave us the Bomb!  Us!  
The US!  He gave us the bomb!  God chose us to do His will on Earth as it is in 
Heaven.   Where is Harry Truman when you need him?  God started warning Bush 
that he could be brought down with Enron's bring-down, but the dolt has misread 
the writings on the wall every step of the way.  With "Mission Accomplished" 
God realized what a terrible mistake He had made with Bush, the failed 
Uebermensch, and so, as He has so often  done before, He just turned his back 
and walked away.  So now it's we who have to clean up all this fan flung shit 
while God sulks in his corner, wondering why he can't find true believers like 
Allah can.  And though it's fun to catch a preacher with his pants down, and a 
homophobe with a dick in his mouth, this isn't a time for fun and games.  We 
need to get down to some serious work before God gets reorganized.

Mike Geary
Memphis

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