[guide.chat] Fwd: Jokes from page 34

  • From: Keith Wines <muckyduck2@xxxxxxxxx>
  • To: "guide chat" <guide.chat@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Fri, 9 Sep 2011 20:15:36 +0100

:Fwd: Jokes from page 34

 Jokes from page 34

Hi all,
these jokes are from pages 34 upwards

An elderly man shuffles into a chemist and asks for Viagra. 'No problem,' says 
the pharmacist. 'How much do you want?' 'Just four.' replies the old geezer. 
'But could you cut them into tiny pieces? I'm not interested in sex. I just 
want to be able to piss without hitting my slippers.'

A blonde was in a sex shop and stopped at the dildo counter. 'I'd like that 
nice fat tartan one with the white top.' she politely asked the shop attendant, 
who replied: 'It's not for sale, love. That's my therermos flask.'

A man ishaving problems with his dick, which certainly had seen better times. 
He consults a doctor who, after a couple of tests, says, 'Sorry, but you've 
overdone it the last 30 years. Your dick is burned out. You only have 30 
erections left in your penis'. The man walks home, deeply depressed. His wife 
is waiting for him at the front door and he tells her what the doc told him. 
She says, 'Oh no! Only 30 times! We shouldn't waste that! We should make a 
list!' He replies, 'I already made a list on the way home, andI'm afraid your 
name isn't on it.'

A couple of teenage boys walk into their local chemist and ask for a packet of 
tampons. 'Are they for your mum?' asks the man behind the counter. 'No. They're 
for us,' reply the boys. 'Why?' asks the baffled man behind the counter. 'It 
says on TV that you can swin, surf, dive, play tennis, rollerblade and ride 
horses if you use tampons.'
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