[guide.chat] Fwd :Insults !
- From: "Keith Wines" <keith.wines@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: "guide chat" <guide.chat@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Tue, 28 Sep 2010 00:00:29 +0100
-----Original Message-----
From: Judith
Sent To: Keith, I would like to thank Judith for taking the trouble to get this
joke to us all here on the chat line ,Keith
Subject :Fwd : Insults !
Subject: Fw: Insults !
When Insults had Class
These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled
down to
4-letter words.
The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor:
She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison."
He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or
of some
unspeakable disease."
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your
mistress."
"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston
Churchill
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great
pleasure.."
- Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the
dictionary." -
William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."
- Moses
Hadas
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of
it." - Mark
Twain
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend
... if you
have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second ... if there is one."
- Winston
Churchill, in response.
"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen
Bishop
"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." - Irvin
S. Cobb
"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." - Samuel
Johnson
"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles,
Count
Talleyrand
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" -
Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." - Oscar Wilde
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than
illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx
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