[guide.chat] : Fw: Tax Office and Grandpa

-----Original Message-----
From: Sheila
Sent On: 10/05/2010 05:25
 
Subject: Fw: Tax Office and Grandpa


Subject: FW: Tax Office and Grandpa

 


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            Grandpa <
             
            The Tax Department decides to audit Grandpa, and summons him to the 
Tax Office.

            The Tax auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his 
lawyer.

            The auditor said, 'Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and 
no full-time employment, Which you explain by saying that you win money 
gambling. I'm not sure the Tax Office finds that believable.'

            I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it,' says Grandpa. 'How about 
a demonstration?'

            The auditor thinks for a moment and said, 'Okay. Go ahead.'

            Grandpa says, 'I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my 
own eye.'

            The auditor thinks a moment and says, 'It's a bet.'

            Grandpa removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor's jaw drops.

            Grandpa says, 'Now, I'll bet you two thousand dollars that I can 
bite my other eye.'

            Now the auditor can tell Grandpa isn't blind, so he takes the bet.

            Grandpa removes his dentures and bites his good eye..

            The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three 
grand, with Grandpa's lawyer as a witness. He starts to get nervous.

            'Want to go double or nothing?' Grandpa asks 'I'll bet you six 
thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that 
wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between.'

            The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully 
and decides there's no way this old guy could possibly manage that stunt, so he 
agrees again.

            Grandpa stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although 
he strains mightily, he can't make the stream reach the wastebasket on the 
other side, so he pretty much urinates all over the auditor's desk.

            The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a 
major loss into a huge win.

            But Grandpa's own lawyer moans and puts his head in his hands.

            'Are you okay?' the auditor asks.

            'Not really,' says the lawyer. 'This morning, when Grandpa told me 
he'd been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty-five thousand dollars that he 
could come in here and piss all over your desk and that you'd be happy about 
it!'

            Don't Mess with Old People!! 

              
             
           

                 
                 

           
     
            
     
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